


Spiral

by BulletStrong



Series: Death and Life [1]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Swan Queen - Freeform, swanqueen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-17
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-05-14 11:20:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 29,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5741809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BulletStrong/pseuds/BulletStrong
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After rescuing Emma and Snow from the death curse, Regina feels the rejection from her son and begins spiraling into a depression that literally breaks her heart. Will Emma be able save the queen during a weeklong adventure that aims to reunite a family? Set during season 2. Swan Queen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Diagnosis

**Author's Note:**

> This story is going to contain some serious suicide mentions, mentions of non-consensual sex, and a lot of self-loathing. So read with caution.
> 
> This was inspired by a prompt from AmazonianTheifEss. Thank you for your message!
> 
> So here we go…

“Congratulations. You just reunited mother and son. Maybe one day they'll even invite you to dinner.”

Regina walked down Main Street despondently, her head hung and her arms crossed over her chest. The damn imp was right. She was nothing. She was a scapegoat that no one would miss if she were gone. They would simply move down the line and blame someone else for all their woes. 

“You just reunited mother and son.” 

Henry hated her. Ever since he found out he was adopted, he pulled away as if blood was all that mattered, as if she was a leper. Then that damn book came into the picture and he finally had a reason to hate her, something to add to his long list of things wrong with her. It honestly shouldn’t hurt this much being that she was physically and emotionally abused as a child and sexually abused as a wife. But no one ever stopped to ask about her. The Blue Fairy never answered her wishes. 

And now, Henry considered Emma fucking Swan to be his mother, not the woman that lived and breathed for him. Rumple was right. Regina wasn’t his mother. Sons loved their mothers through their flaws and cherished the love. No, Henry took her for granted and tossed her aside. The worst part was that, like the pathetic witch she was, she would kneel at his feet and beg for affection if he stood in front of her. 

“Maybe one day they'll even invite you to dinner.”

He would never love her. No one would. So why was she still trying? Regina couldn’t come up with a plausible answer because it would probably be better for everyone if she just… ended it now. Hell, the town would throw a parade and host a dance party on her grave. But no, she wouldn’t let that happen. Maybe she could leave town and end it out there, where she could be a Jane Doe, someone people pitied. 

She quickly shook her head. The Evil Queen was to be feared, not pitied. She was not weak. Except she was. She was weak, desperate for love, and an absolute wreck. It started the night Daniel died and she grew and grew into this wretched, groveling, weak woman. Regina finally reached her front door and used the door to hold her weight up as she felt sobs begin to wrack her body. She had to get inside before someone saw. Though she wasn’t sure that would help, as her sobs were heartbreakingly loud and unfiltered. The tears were streaming down her face at an alarming rate and her nose began running. She didn’t even blink when she wiped her mouth and nose with her expensive coat sleeve. 

She trekked up the stairs, tripping the entire way up. By the fifth step she violently removed her heels and threw them into the wall, creating a sizable dent. Seeing the destruction made her feel better so she ran down the stairs and smashed everything. Glass littered the floor and Regina just walked right over it, barely wincing when they imbedded into her soles and arches. Next, she grabbed her large apple cider dispenser and hurled it across the kitchen, savoring the sound of crunching glass and liquor hitting the tiled floor. She let out a primal scream, feeling her lungs burn deliciously. She huffed as she ran to the study, smacking the power button on the CD player Henry made her buy. She clumsily searched through the music selection, looking for a specific song that really represented her mood. She heard him listen to it once; he said it was his favorite at the moment. Apparently her likes were of no consequence. She growled as she ripped the CD out of its case, throwing the plastic holder away for good measure. With inept fingers, she slammed the CD into the player, chose her track, and set in on replay before blasting it to the highest volume. Oh no, her fucking neighbors wouldn’t hear her breakdown. 

“Party girls don't get hurt. Can't feel anything, when will I learn. I push it down, push it down.” 

She sprinted to the kitchen and literally ripped it apart, destroying cabinets and drawers in her search for something inside herself. Her life had always been about rules and etiquette and tidiness and perfection. This house was a disaster, was a breach of societal rules, and Regina reveled in it, chuckling darkly as she imagined what her mothers reaction would be. 

“Controlling, conniving bitch,” Regina bellowed angrily as if her mother was in the house. The brunette let out a soft sob, her anger replaced with utter sadness, “You ruined my life.”

Regina lost her energy suddenly, her knees giving out, and she landed into a heap of glass. She cried out from the pain digging into her back and from a sudden pinch in her chest. It felt like… like her heart was breaking, which was plausible because of magic. She should check that out but she couldn’t find the energy to take it out and inspect it. Plus, a broken heart was too ironic for her at that moment.

Well, what a way for The Evil Queen and daughter of the Queen of Hearts to go. Many accused her of lacking the ability to love like her mother; some said she had no heart. But she did and that’s why all of this hurt so damn much. She should’ve listened to Cora. Love is weakness and all it does is chip away at you until your gone. Regina Mills was gone. The Evil Queen was gone. Madame Mayor was gone. All that’s left is a shell of a person, a person on the brink of insanity and/or suicide. Did it really matter? So she cried harder because she didn’t matter. She could break things, destroy her home, scream and yell, throw a tantrum, and no one would notice or even care.

“But I'm holding on for dear life, won't look down, won't open my eyes. Keep my glass full until morning light, 'cause I'm just holding on for tonight.”

She was sprawled on her back, on top of glass and splintered wood, with a hand pressed to her chest in an attempt to stop the burning and crushing sensation in between her ribs. Her eyes stared directly ahead, fascinated by the minute cracks in the ceiling, and listened to the depressing music on repeat. She couldn’t tell how long she stayed that way.

She also couldn’t tell how Emma fucking Swan entered her home. She locked, didn’t she? She caught sight of those blonde curls and turned to peek at Henry’s mother, his real mother. She looked shell shocked, staring at the brunette with wide, gorgeous green eyes. Gorgeous? Where the hell did that come from?

Nonetheless, Emma was still, her body tensed. Regina swore she saw a shine in those eyes but she dismissed the thought before it could fully process because Miss Swan did not care about her. She said it clearly not too long before the curse broke. 

“I don't care about what happens to you.”

That seemed to be a trend. Emma ran to the CD player and powered it off, leaving them in a deafening silence that made Regina feel even worse. The anger was seeping away and the depression was descending on her. She could feel it. She felt it when her mother killed Daniel. She felt it on her wedding night, after the king finished with her. She felt it when Henry had said he hated her the first time, with such conviction, like it was a fact. She felt it now. She was drowning. She snapped her eyes back to the ceiling lazily, her body sluggish.

“Regina?” The blonde whispered as if she was speaking to a caged animal or a psychopath off of her medication, which was a true possibility. Regina let out a dark chuckle. By standards of this realm, she should be locked up in a padded room and force fed pills through a straw. In her peripheral, she saw Emma flinch. Good. Now go away. 

“Please, let me be.” Regina grumbled, her voice low. Her head was pounding and she felt bile rise in her throat. Maybe that’s how she’ll go, chocking on vomit. 

“Are you—?” 

“Okay?” Regina sniffed, “I’d go with no.” 

Emma didn’t respond, didn’t move a muscle. She just stared and Regina couldn’t find the mental strength to look. She wasn’t looking for pity or, god forbid, sympathy. She just wanted to be alone and she wanted to die. Preferable, she wanted to be alone as she died so Emma ‘fucking gorgeous eyes’ Swan needed to scram. Regina managed to lift her upper body, wincing as she felt the imbedded glass cut deeper. She wiggled her toes, suddenly fascinated by their movement. 

Then she felt a soft hand move her hair away from her face, “Come on, let’s get you upstairs.”

Regina reached up a hand to scratch her throat, feeling dehydrated and nauseous. She shook her head, letting Emma know that she would not be listening to her, and lifted her body slowly, managing to cringe only once. She hobbled up the stairs, sighing when she heard steps behind her. She had to give it to the blonde. She was one persistent bitch. Lost in thought, she tripped on the top step, her toe throbbing from the impact. The blonde, who swooped down to pick her up bridal style, thwarted her descent and Regina didn’t fight it. She was mentally and physically tired so she wrapped her arms around Emma’s neck and burrowed her face there. She swore she felt Emma shiver but discounted it. It was probably a fearful shiver as being so close to her was probably repulsive. 

Emma carried her into her master bathroom and set her down gently onto the toilet lid, “Where’s your first aid kit?”

Regina furrowed her brows and peered at the blonde from under her lashes. Emma was staring at her own nails, her fingers roving over the smooth marble. The brunette sighed when she saw Emma’s lip quiver. Why was this woman pretending to care about her? They both knew the truth.

“I don't care about what happens to you.”

After several moments of silence, Emma let out an exasperated sigh, “I need to take out the glass from your back and legs. Please, where’s your first aid kit?”

“Top left cabinet.” She stated stoically, hoping that once Emma was done playing nurse she would leave. Let Regina end it all. She watched as the blonde pulled the medium-sized package from the bathroom cabinet and zipped it open carelessly. As Emma flipped open the lid, she motioned for Regina to swivel so that her back faced the blonde. 

“Um… Could you take off your shirt and pants?” The blonde mumbled, seemingly embarrassed. Regina cringed as she peeled off her blouse and pants, the removal causing some pieces of glass to shed as well. 

“Fuck.” Regina whispered in agony and Emma’s lips pursed. The brunette sat down delicately on the lid again and gestured for the blonde to begin. Emma picked up a pair of tweezers and began extracting the larger pieces from her back, Regina hissing the entire time.

“What happened?” The blonde questioned softly as the air in the room grew thick.

“I was angry,” Regina responded calmly, as if she was talking about the weather. The blonde scoffed internally. Typical Regina, “What are you doing here?”

Emma flinched when she removed a smaller piece and Regina cried out. She screwed her eyes shut, willing her emotions away, “Charming got a noise complaint call and when they discovered which house it was coming from, they sent me because… I guess because I protected you before falling into the portal so they thought… you wouldn’t—“

“Incinerate you?” Regina finished with a sneer. The blonde nodded but realized that the brunette couldn’t see her.

“Yeah, something like that,” Emma paused, trying to collect her thoughts, “We should’ve invited you.”

“Yes, well, it doesn’t matter now.” Regina whispered, not believing the blonde. They left her in Gold’s shop on purpose. They knew and they didn’t want her. 

“Apparently it really matters to you.” Emma responded shyly. Regina shook her head, deciding she was over this conversation. She just wanted Emma to finish so that she could go to bed or, you know, think over things. The blonde continued to work thoroughly, medicating and bandaging as she went. Once she was done with her back, she ordered the brunette to stand so that she could rid the back of her legs of shards. Emma moaned silently as Regina’s backside came into view. The brunette did not catch it.

“Henry is just a kid. He doesn’t understand that life isn’t black and white, good or bad. Soon, he realize that you love him and he’ll apologize, you’ll see.” Emma whispered, hoping that her words would soothe the brunette. Regina perked up a bit, hating herself for putting so much on the opinion of an eleven year old. Hopefully, one day, it won’t hurt when he screams at her or dismisses her on the street. Oh fuck. She was talking about the future. This damn blonde was giving her hope and hope was the cruelest thing to give someone that has no direction, no chance. Maybe she should wait a little bit longer to get her affairs in order. Yes, just a few days and then she’ll end it. Oh, whom was she kidding? She wasn’t going to take her own life. However, she could leave this town unscathed with magic, start a new life. She could leave Henry with Emma. It was what he wanted. He hated her anyway, right? It would be better for everyone involved.

“Miss Swan, I want you to have adopt papers written up. I’d like to give up my parental rights.” Emma jumped, her heart dropping. The Regina Mills she knew would never utter those words.

“No,” Emma yelled, her voice reverberating off the tiles, “What the hell are you saying? Henry loves you!”

“He’ll never care for me the way he cares for you. Who are we trying to fool, Miss Swan? He wants to be with you so I giving him what he wants!” Regina bellowed, her voice watery and her eyes glistening. 

“He doesn’t want you to give up on him! He’s just being stubborn and a bit stupid right now. All kids are stupid, Regina!” Emma was shocked as Regina whirled around, fully bandaged and taped, and puffed out a shaky breath. The emotions were clear on her face, the sadness, the agony, the anger, and the sorrow. 

“I’m going to get those papers and I am going to sign them. And when I give them to you, you will sign them as well because you know that that’s what’s best for him.” Regina cried, tears dripping from her chin and landing on Emma’s hand, which were resting on the brunette’s naked thighs. 

“No, what’s best for him is having both of his mothers. He’s our son, Regina.” The blonde spoke with such conviction that Regina almost caved. She almost leaned forward to kiss the blonde, she almost hugged her, and she almost confessed the feelings she had been trying to disguise with hatred and anger. Almost. 

“I suppose we’ll speak about this tomorrow or some other day.” Regina whispered and shrugged non-committedly causing Emma to send her a glare. 

“Give me your fucking feet.” Emma growled. She worked silently, thank goodness, on the brunette’s feet, adding cream and wrapping the whole foot. Regina stood, balancing on the sides of her feet, and hobbled to her bed. 

Regina slid under the covers and clutched a pillow to her chest as the tears continued to stream from her eyes. The brunette found herself wishing that Emma would slide in behind and hold her, comfort her. But she didn’t. She just stood by the door awkwardly before pointing her thumb towards the street unsurely.

“So, uh, I gotta go,” Emma backed up into the hallway outside her door, “Take care, Regina. I’ll be back to check on you.”

“I’m not holding my breath.” Regina stated stubbornly, needing to separate herself from the affectionate tone Emma had used. She heard the blonde sigh then footsteps that slowly faded to the front door slamming shut. Regina squeezed her eyes shut, willing the sob climbing up her throat back down unsuccessfully. Two sentences playing on repeat in her head made her want to sink into the ground and die. 

“Congratulations. You just reunited mother and son. Maybe one day they'll even invite you to dinner.”

“I don't care about what happens to you.”

Yes, that was why hope was the cruelest thing. 

~_~_~

Emma walked to the Bug in shock, running her hands up and down her face. When she got the noise complaint, she thought the caller had it all wrong, that it wasn’t 108 Mifflin but 107 or 101 maybe. But when she had actually arrived on the block, she knew it was Regina. Still, when she broke in using a hairpin, she didn’t expect to walk into a danger zone. There was glass and splintered wood everywhere, music so loud that her eardrums vibrated, and, for a moment, she though she had found Regina’s corpse. Her body was so pale but there was blood everywhere. In those ten seconds, her heart stopped and her chest tightened. 

In the Enchanted Forest, she told her mother that Regina was the one to blame for everything but she had been angry and wanted to be home. Tonight, the brunette saved them. At the party, she thought about everything, really contemplated. Cora was the catalyst. Cora, that wretched woman, was horrid and most likely led Regina down a dark path. And Emma knew that darkness could be beat. When she was a young criminal, she never thought she’d end up in a town filled with fairytale characters but here she was. And she was their Savior. If Emma could come back from her youth so could Regina. 

She believed that all the way home. She believed it when she entered the apartment. She believed it when she greeted her family hello. She believed until her parents started throwing doubts in.

“Where were you? Everyone wanted you to give toast.” Snow smiled, unpacking a large slice of chocolate cake and sliding it over to her daughter.

“I went to check on the noise complaint. It was Regina,” Emma cleared her throat, “She was in bad shape, probably in the middle of a breakdown.”

“So you turned the music down? Nice. Cake?” Snow turned to Charming and handed him a paper plate. Emma gaped at their nonchalance. 

“Did you hear what I said?” The blonde asked sternly, dropping her plastic fork down. Snow sighed before looking to her husband, as if asking him to take the reins on the conversation. Emma felt like a teenager about to be scolded. It infuriated her. They lost their chance decades ago. 

“Emma, as long as she isn’t wreaking havoc, we don’t care what happens to her. Also, why would we care? She ruined our lives and doesn’t even feel sorry about it. Maybe you should just leave her alone. Let her rot.” Charming pursed his lips and puffed out his chest. Yes, because Rumple had no part in what happened, right? Let’s pile it on the Evil Queen, whose strings had been pulled from youth by Rumplestiltskin and Cora. Emma had been a marionette once. She could’ve ended up like Regina, killing people and drowning in anger. If Emma was given a hundred chances than so should the brunette.

“That’s my son’s mother!” Emma yelled, her cheeks red with incredibility. 

“No, you’re Henry’s mother,” Snow sighed, looking at Emma with barely contained disappointment, “She is not his mother. And we gave her plenty o chance in The Enchanted Forest. No more! We’re done being duped by her!” 

“And if you know what’s best for you and Henry, you’d let her spiral out of control. That way there’s no one to blame but herself for her demise.”

“Sweetheart, please, don’t go around the mansion anymore. For us.” Emma shook her head before pushing the cake away from her, disgusted. 

“Some heroes you are. Maybe Henry should’ve seen this, get the kid off his high horse.” Emma spit before jogging up to the loft, not once looking back.

~_~_~

Regina doubled over, her knees to her chest, and let out an agonizing scream. The pain in her chest was unbearable and she was getting desperate.

“Rumplestiltskin!” She bellowed nasally as tears streamed down her face. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw smoke dissipate and knew that the imp was present. She expected mocking or jeering or something but he just walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed. He reached out a hand to remove hair that had been plastered to her face because of the tears.

“What’s the matter, dearie?” He drawled and, oddly enough, he sounded concerned. Regina tried to breathe but a weak wheeze came out. 

“My heart.” She struggled to speak but he understood. When he wasn’t manipulating her, he was a good mentor. He could’ve been so much more if he just let their vendetta go. When Regina was younger, she had thought of him as a second father. Now, he was an enemy. But he was the only one that could help with this. She didn’t trust the sanctimonious flying blue cretin as far as she could throw her. Not that Rumple was much better.

“May I?” He placed his hand on her chest and Regina tensed. She contemplated her options. She didn’t trust him with her heart as he might just crush it and end it all. After a few moments, she decided to throw caution to the wind. This pain was too excruciating to be picky. She nodded her head and Rumple pushed in and grabbed her heart lightly before pulling it out rapidly. 

Rumple stared at it with fascination. Her heart was flashing black and red but there was a noticeable crack running down the center. The fissure was just on the surface though.

“A broken heart,” Rumple whispered in awe, “I’ve only heard of this, read about it.”

“What is it?” Regina gasped, watching the heart’s colors swirl with intrigue. 

“A broken heart occurs when a magic wielder’s emotions have spiraled out of control with sadness,” Rumple slowly looked Regina in the eyes, “This is incurable and the process has already begun. I’d say you have a few weeks left, dearie.”

Regina screwed her eyes shut. It looks like her death wouldn’t even be her choice. She had a few weeks of life left and she couldn’t say she was going to live it to the fullest. 

“Alright,” Regina whispered, already accepting her fate, “Thank you for coming.”

Rumple didn’t move. He just stared, looking confused, “Good luck, dearie.”

Regina just nodded succinctly, watching him disappear. She needed to get those papers written up. Once she was gone for good, she needed to know that Henry would be with Emma, especially in the eyes of the law. She though about a will, realizing she had to give her fortunes away. Maybe as a college fund for her… Emma’s son. In a way, this was a blessing. She wouldn’t have to take her own life, which she realized she was too afraid to do. She could just let magic take her, break her heart. It would be a poetic end. Magic brought her freedom and now it would end her. Hopefully, she could die in peace. She didn’t want Henry or Emma around. 

She didn’t want them to forgive her and love her just because her death was imminent. And she didn’t want to run around looking for some nonexistent cure. That’s if they even care. Regina flinched, feeling the pain in her chest intensify for a moment. 

Fate was a bitch.


	2. Confirmation

Emma’s eyes snapped open when she heard the front door open before running to pull on a pair of jeans. The night before, she skipped dinner, not wanting to face her parents. She couldn’t believe the words that had spewed from their lips and she didn’t want to say anything else to hurt their feelings. It was her inner orphan fearing that they would abandon her if she behaved badly. Then after dinner, Henry greeted her with a smile and she halfheartedly returned it. She tried to talk to him about his attitude but he shut her out with earphones and a textbook, like he knew that she was gearing up to lecture. Now, she was home and he had just arrived from school.

“Henry, come up here please.” Emma bellowed as she zipped her jeans. She distinctly heard a groan and gaped as her son stomped up the stairs.

“Yeah?” Henry dropped his backpack onto the floor and plopped down on the bed, ignoring Emma’s glare the entire way. Emma planted her feet and crossed her arms.

“I haven’t been a good mother,” Emma sighed, watching Henry’s eyes grow wide, “I’ve been a good friend and I love you more than anything but I haven’t done right by you.”

“What’re you talking about?” Henry whispered, his face contorting. Emma cleared her throat before walking towards the bed. She knelt down, aligning their eye levels.

“Kid, I should’ve brought our family together. Instead, I allowed you to treat your mother badly. She and I had an… interesting relationship but I see now that she was just scared of losing you, of losing your love. She loves you Henry and,” Emma felt her voice croak as tears filled her eyes, “We really screwed up. We could’ve been a family, the three of us, but we hurt her.”

Henry shook his head but Emma could see the emotion on his face, “But… she’s the Evil Queen.”

“So what, kid? You’re right. She was the Evil Queen. Now, all she wants is to be your mom, to have your love,” Henry screwed his eyes shut, “She—“

“Stop!” He jumped up from the bed, “She made me feel crazy and she lied. I don’t want to talk to her right now!”

Emma shook her head, “If you don’t tell her, have a calm conversation about it, nothing with be resolved.”

“Maybe I don’t want it to be fixed! I have you and grandma and grandpa! That’s all I need!” He yanked his backpack onto the desk and swiftly pulled out some notebooks furiously.

“Kid, you don’t mean that and, if you don’t talk to her, you’ll regret it one day,” Emma smoothed down her black tank top nervously, “Don’t let Snow and Charming tell you how to feel. Don’t let anyone manipulate you. If you love your mom, you talk to her and you fix this.”

He didn’t respond, more like acted he didn’t hear her but Emma knew that he did. His ears were red and she just knew that if she turned him around, tears would be streaming down his face. Emma knew he was struggling with his feelings. Regina raised him and, from what she saw when she snooped through old photos in the brunette woman’s photo albums, they were happy for a long time. As Henry got older though, the photos became scarce and, in most, their smiles were faked. She assumed finding out about the adoption put some distance between them. Thinking about it that way, Emma realized that Regina had feared losing him long before she rode into town. She had been the catalyst that finally tore them apart. If she had just stopped and took a breath, she would’ve saw the true meaning behind Regina’s attempts to run her out of town. 

Everyone said she had done it to stop Emma from breaking the curse and, maybe that’s what she told Sydney, but Regina wanted to be loved and she had been denied it her entire life. Cora, that witch, was pure evil. She figured that Regina could’ve been worse. She could have been heartless with no capability for love. Regina had been scared but fear was weakness and the queen couldn’t be weak. 

After a few minutes of deafening silence, Emma slipped on her red leather jacket and left to fulfill her promise.

It was bland and cold. After almost thirty years, she comes to the conclusion that her bedroom was ordinary and undecorated. It was sterile. The walls were boring, the picture frames held photos of black-and-white nature. Her sheets were all white. 

Just like the women that resided there, it had no personality, no drive, no life. Why didn’t she splash some paint or put up fun pictures of Henry’s youth or his drawings? Why didn’t she make this house a home for her son? Maybe if she had, he would have dropped her like a bad habit. Maybe if she had been more open…

It didn’t matter now anyway. She didn’t have a time machine and she was slowly marching towards the metaphorical gas chambers, where she would take her last breath alone. They’ll probably mark down the date of her death and hold a parade each year, like a damn holiday. She deserved it though. She was wretched, worthless, useless, vile, shameful, and so much more. Cora had been right. She was a waste of space and air. 

Regina heard the front door open but she didn’t move an inch. Maybe it would be some angry constituent coming to take her life? How quaint. Or it was Emma, who claimed to care but, honestly, who would have love in their heart for such a reprehensible monster. No one, that’s the answer life has shown her. 

“Regina?” She heard the blonde call out, the crunching of glass audible under her heavy boots. Regina sighed. She looked like a mess and… oh who gives a fuck. The Sheriff saw her the night before during a breakdown. The façade had coming crumbling down like a Chip’s Ahoy cookie. Regina Mills was done playing the part. She was done pretending to be strong because she wasn’t. The girl that Daniel loved, the naïve, frightened girl, she still existed but the girl’s kindness had been sucked dry. All that was left was fear and scars. 

And come all! Come see the miserable wretch Regina Mills as she lies in bed without energy or drive to live! Tickets sold at front window! Get them while her heart beats! 

“Regina?” She sounded a bit desperate now, as if afraid that she would walk in to another disaster, which wasn’t far from the truth. She didn’t sleep a wink the night before so she mostly likely had large, dark bags under her reddened eyes. Her mascara had run down her face, leaving black streaks down her cheeks. Her hair was probably unkempt from tossing and turning from trying to dissuade the pain in her chest wall. The pain became tolerable sometime during the night. She figured there would be bouts of pain when the heart cracked a bit more but otherwise, it would be a constant jolt when she breathed or moved. She needed to get her mother’s books from the vault. She needed to know what was coming. 

“Come on, Regina, where are you?” She sounded close so the brunette kept quiet, hoping that the blonde would turn around and leave her the hell alone. She wasn’t worth Emma’s time. All Regina could hear was the stomp of boots sprinting towards her room and she grimaced. The blonde sure was persistent. Regina reached for a tissue from her bedside table and tried to wipe her face, succeeding and leaving her face free of makeup or smudges. She looked younger this way but, to rule a town or a kingdom, you couldn’t look young because youthfulness embodied hope and excitement. As a leader, those qualities were seen as weak, which was fitting. Underneath all of the decorum, the makeup, the façade, Regina was weak. She knew that now. 

“What the hell! I’ve been calling you for like an hour now.” Emma walked into the bedroom cautiously, as if Regina had set up a bear trap or something equally ridiculous. The brunette didn’t have the energy to throw a witty quip back. She tried to open her mouth but her jaw felt so stiff. So, she just sat there, staring at the blonde. Emma walked closer, slightly perturbed by the blank look in Regina’s chocolate orbs. She had seen this plenty of times in her foster homes: Depression. It was a shitty state of mind. She had experienced several times during her life. It literally sucked the life out of you, making you lose all interest in everything. 

“I’m just here to check up on you,” Emma pretended to cough, needing a second to gather her thoughts, “So, uh, you need anything?”

Regina nodded, unable to find the power to speak yet. Emma looked at her expectantly but the brunette’s eyes fell closed unexpectedly, her eyelids feeling hefty suddenly, and her hand reached up to rub her chest. Emma furrowed a brow and reached forward, placing the tips of her fingers on Regina’s arm. The brunette’s eyes snapped open and she seemed genuine surprised to see her, as if she forgot the last few minutes. She didn’t though. She just thought that the blonde would write her off as a mental case and run off like it was contagious. 

Emma sat down lightly on the edge of the bed, “Are you okay?”

“Vault,” Regina wheezed, “Cora’s books.”

Emma froze, shocked by the changes she was witnessing, before stuttering, “You want me to get your mother’s books from your vault and bring them here?”

Regina nodded minutely, feeling the action drain her, but felt compelled to add, “She… not my mother. Horrible… witch.”

Emma felt her eyes burn with emotion. She didn’t understand what was going on. She thought this was depression but the way Regina was lacking energy or the ability to communicate, which was something else. She wanted to question her about it but she knew she wouldn’t be getting intelligible answers. 

“I’m going to your vault to get the stuff,” Her voice was constricted, “Don’t move, okay?”

Regina found the energy to glare because, really, where the hell was she going to go with the vitality of a corpse?

“Go.”

Emma walked briskly down the stairs, stopping only to survey the damage done to the home in daylight and promising to clean it up for the brunette, before heading to her Bug. As she slammed the car into drive, she took one last worried glance at the mansion. Her parents told her to let Regina drown but she wouldn’t, she couldn’t, and not just because she’s Henry’s other mother. She felt a strange kinship with her, a deeper connection. She felt it when she touched Regina’s arm before opening the portal. She felt it every time the brunette was near. Yes, they butted heads but now that every thing was calm, she could reflect and she saw a lot of herself in Regina. She couldn’t give on up her because she didn’t want to. She couldn’t imagine living in a Storybrooke where no one challenged her, no one was unique or like her. She needed Regina. She wanted Regina. 

So, when she arrived at the vault, she walked in confidently, not letting her parents dictate how she should feel. It may have worked on Henry but it wasn’t working on her. She rounded up every book she could find and made several trips from the mausoleum to the yellow car. She was determined because Regina was her counterpart and she couldn’t lose her and she couldn’t let Regina lose herself. 

She glared at the books momentarily, wondering if she had the strength to carry them all up the mansion stairs. She closed her eyes and took a breath before releasing the air slowly but when she opened her eyes, the books were gone. 

“What the fuck?” She grumbled, swiveling and searching idiotically. She looked up and saw Regina smirked at her through the window and she broke out into a smile, “That’s it, Regina. Annoy me, that’ll get your spirits up.”

Emma slammed her car door shut and ran into the mansion, practically racing up the stairs. Regina managed a chuckle when she heard Emma’s clunky steps coming towards her bedroom. When she heard the backfire of that piece of junk Emma call a car, she found herself curious about her condition and that curiosity gave her the will to stumble to the window. She watched as Emma seemed to contemplate how she would get so many items up to her bedroom and decided to talk mercy on the woman. In many ways, Regina was angry at herself for letting her relationship with Emma become so sour. The blonde, even after everything she had done, did her a favor. So she used her magic and transported the crop of books to her bed, scattering them around the mattress. When she saw the blonde notice the missing items and curse, she couldn’t resist the small smirk that appeared. Yes, bothering the blonde was her favorite pastime. 

As Emma’s steps got closer, Regina hobbled back onto the mattress with difficulty. Her burst of motivation was gone and she was left more exhausted than ever. She felt her heart twinge as she settled amidst Cora’s things. 

“Thanks for the help with the stuff.” Emma smiled lopsidedly and, much to the brunette’s chagrin, she was charmed by it. Regina succeeded in returning the gesture with a slight tilt of her lips. Emma walked forward and ran her finger over some of the books, tracing some of the titles. Regina took the opportunity to look over the blonde, her eyes roaming over her face. She had to admit she always lusted after her but, now, she could see Emma’s beauty. Regina quickly shook her head because there was no way she was going to start having feelings for the bane of her existence weeks before her demise. She averted her eyes just before Emma looked at her.

“So… what’re these for?” Emma asked warily. She had a bad feeling about all of this. Regina cleared her throat and tried to pry her mouth open.

“Research. Don’t worry.” Regina snapped her mouth closed, her teeth grinding unpleasantly. 

“Oh, yeah, cool,” Emma’s eyes darted over Regina’s form, “Do you need help looking through them? It’s, like, a lot of crap to look through.”

“No,” Regina replied before adding jokingly, “I got this.”

Emma cracked a smile at hearing foreign slang words flow from Regina’s prim and proper mouth, “Yeah, alright. You call me if you need anything?”

“Probably not.” Regina felt her jaw slackening, making her speech a bit easier, and sighed with relief. She brought a hand up to caress her cheeks. Emma rolled her eyes.

The blonde reached for Regina’s phone and tossed it onto the bed next to the sorceress, “Call me if you need anything.”

Emma didn’t wait for a response. She turned and walked out of the mansion confidently. Regina let out a humored breath, staring at the door. The nerve of that woman… it was what kept her going at the moment. In the back of her mind, she wondered if she should inform Emma of her illness but quickly shut it down. She shut it all down. She didn’t have feelings for Emma, she didn’t trust Emma, and she didn’t want Emma around. Maybe if she kept saying it, it would become true. 

In order to take her mind off of it, she began scouring through her mother’s books in search of information about a magical broken heart. It took about two hours before she found the two pages she was looking for.

“Death by a Broken Heart. Lovely,” Regina sat back against the headboard, “This affliction occurs when a magic wielder’s emotions are unstable and extreme sadness becomes a main sentiment. Magic is essentially tied to emotion and when the user experiences a severe case of depression, the heart, the center of magic, begins to crack under the strain. The victim will experience pain in their chest, at times insufferable, bouts of intense lethargy followed by a burst of energy, and eventual death if left untreated. Strangely, happiness cannot cure this infirmity. The only cure known for this affliction is True Love’s Kiss.”

Regina tossed a bookmark onto the page before slamming it shut. So the imp told the truth, she was doomed. Her true love died at the hands of Cora decades ago. She felt a sharp pain her chest. Yes, she was going to be dead in a few weeks. Whenever her burst of energy arrived, she needed to get a move on. She had affairs to get in order. Her time was almost officially up. 

She pondered what she should do. Should she have a will written up and allow Emma to figure everything out once she gone? Regina didn’t know if she had the mental facility to face their son and explain what was happening. Would he laugh? Would he jump for joy? Would he be at all upset? And what about Emma? Would she miss her when she was gone?

Regina angrily kicked all of the books onto the floor before flopping down on the bed, her eyes falling shut almost immediately. She sighed as she felt sleep taking her. At least in her dreams, she could pretend that she was a good mother, someone Henry would be proud of. She could dream of a life she could never have and pretend it was real for just a little while. She laid back and allowed an image to be conjured. Regina cooking breakfast, Henry sitting at the table, eagerly awaiting his meal, and… Emma attempting to make toast. The blonde would burn a few batches before Regina shooed her from the kitchen with a peck to the lips and she would smile as she heard Emma and her son laugh and joke.

Regina’s eyes snapped open, “No.”


	3. Plan Beginnings

Emma walked from the mansion with a spring in her step. The brunette had genuinely smiled at her and it was amazingly beautiful to see Regina’s face look at ease. So, as she backed out of the brunette’s bedroom, Emma decided that she would head to the station to tell Charming she was taking a week off. She needed to spend time with Henry and Regina after her long trip to the Enchanted Forest. After her visit to the station, she would go back to the mansion and clean up the mess for Regina. She could ask the brunette for help regarding her newly discovered magic. Maybe that would get her a smile as a reward. 

“Emma, where have you been?” Her father jumped up from his chair, extending his arms out with incredulity and his eyes wide with suspicion. 

The blonde shrugged, “I’ve been busy with Henry and stuff so thanks for holding down the fort. I’m actually going to take the next week off. I need to relax a little.”

“Relax?” Charming asked knowingly, his brow quirked. Emma began shuffling papers into a large pile and organizing her desk. 

“Yeah, with Henry. Maybe go camping, leave town for a day or two, you know, spend time with my son.” Emma shoved her papers in a folder and neatly placed it into the filing cabinet. She couldn’t look her father in the eye, which was strange considering Emma had always been a proficient and effective liar. But he was her dad and he seemed to have a pretty good lie detector. It’s probably where she got the ability. Anyway, she didn’t need him or Snow snooping around in her business. She was grown woman and if she wanted to invite Regina on these little adventures, she could and they had no say. She knew convincing Henry would be a tough conversation but Henry was smart. Emma knew for a fact that he had to be feeling guilty. This time, she would bring them together and she would watch with pride. No jealousy or stupid games. They had a chance to be a real family. Emma wanted that with Regina. Oddly enough, the idea of commitment wasn’t scaring her. It was exciting. She guessed that love could be exciting when you think you’ve found the one.

“Emma,” She heard him sigh with disapproval, “Is Regina a part of your plans?”

“Is that any of your business?” Emma quipped back sarcastically. She was fed up with their meddling. She was almost thirty years old. She didn’t need this torment. 

“You’re our daughter! We worry about her influence!” He bellowed softly, not wanting to sound as aggravated as he was. Emma scoffed.

“I’m not a prepubescent teen! I have my own mind and Regina isn’t trying to do anything, okay? You’re blaming her for something she hasn’t done so you wanna bring down a few notches?” Emma slammed the sliding file cabinet shut with excessive force, the bang reverberating around the room. Charming stalked over to her desk, staring her down as he stood with his hands on his hips.

“She is evil incarnate and I will not apologize for wanting to protect you, and Henry, from her.” He whispered, his voice hard. It made Emma’s blood boil but she managed to keep her voice down by some miracle.

“You don’t know her. You never gave her a chance to tell you her story. No one ever gives us a chance and then those people wonder why we’re so damaged,” Emma felt her eyes blur and burn. She lifted her finger and pointed it at his chest, “You’re a little to late to the party Charming. I stopped needing protection long ago. Maybe you should’ve put my wellbeing above yours twenty nine years ago when you shipped me to this realm.” 

The blonde turned and practically sprinted out of the station, hearing but ignoring her fathers calls the entire way. She kept walking, tears pouring silently down her face, until she reached Mifflin. She wasn’t going to let him ruin her plans. She heard a message sound from her phone as she strutted into the mansion for the third time that day. She pulled out her phone, seeing a text from Snow, and groaned.

“Emma! Your father called me and told me what happened! Please just come home so we can talk. I think you’re misunderstanding us.” Emma read the text aloud and jumped when she heard a small chuckle. 

“Snow, I presume.” Emma looked up to see Regina leaning against the doorframe, a smirk on her lips. The blonde couldn’t help the sigh of relief that escaped.

“You’re up and moving. That’s great,” Emma looked at the brunette’s feet to make sure her feet were covered properly in order to avoid hurting herself on the glass, “I was just coming to help clean up.”

“That’s kind of you,” Emma perked up, “But it’s almost dinner time and it sounds like Snow and Charming are tugging on your leash.”

“Even more reason to stay here and help. They can’t order me around,” Emma stepped forward, hoping that Regina would allow her entry, “Let me help.”

Regina paused for a moment. She was supposed to be avoiding Emma so that her little girl crush would fade but deep inside her fractured heart, she wanted the blonde to stay, to eat dinner with her and have a nightcap. Plus, she had so much energy to dispel so cooking a meal and cleaning with company could help her mind slow down, “Alright.”

Regina turned to the side, giving Emma enough space to go by, “Cool.”

The brunette smiled internally. She didn’t want to get her hopes up but the blonde was making it quite difficult with her sweet gestures and kind words of encouragement. Emma surveyed the damage again and sighed before turning to the brunette uneasily.  
“I have magic and I was wondering if maybe you could help me learn,” She saw Regina’s surprised expression and added, “Back there, your mother tried to take my heart but my magic stopped her somehow. I want to protect my loved ones and I think if used properly, magic is an efficient way to do so. I know Henry doesn’t see it that way but I do and I want you to teach me. I trust you.”

Regina furrowed her brows, “Why do you? Trust me, that is.”

“I need a teacher that has the same interest as me. Protect Henry,” Emma scrutinized her hands, “Plus, I don’t know why, but I feel like I can be myself around you and I never feel that way.”

Regina felt traitorous emotions sprout from those words. No one had ever spoken such kind things about her before. She felt honored, not that she’d ever admit to it. She nodded and gestured towards the study.

“I suppose you want to try cleaning using magic?” Emma nodded and the brunette carefully trekked towards the corner of the room. As she passed the blonde, she interlaced their fingers and pulled her along. Emma barely contained the shiver that threatened to escape when she felt Regina’s hand against her own. 

“Alright,” Regina extracted her hand and Emma pouted adorably, “Magic is emotion. You have to think about what you want to achieve and why you want it to be achieved. Let your emotions take over.” 

Emma nodded concisely before lifting her arms in front of her, her palms facing outward and her fingers aimed at the ceiling. Regina watched intently as Emma closed her eyes. The blonde thought about the night before, seeing Regina sprawled in a pool of her own blood, which was still marring the hardwood. She thought about the glass impaling in the olive skin causing pain. She wanted this cleaned so that Regina wouldn’t get hurt. Regina needed to be safe. 

“Emma!” The blonde opened her eyes and saw Regina’s ecstatic expression before peering around the room, seeing everything looking perfect once again. The blood was gone, the glass and wood was back in its rightful place, and even Regina’s cuts had healed, “You did it!”

“Holy shit,” Emma whispered, staring at her hands in awe. She suddenly broke out into a wide, goofy smile, “That was some Harry Potter shit right there!”

“No, that was some Emma Swan… stuff right there.” Emma couldn’t stop the bark of laughter that rose when Regina uncomfortably replaced the curse word. Regina joined in with a hearty chuckle. Emma felt vindicated, not just about her magical abilities but about this woman. Regina could be helpful, kind, and humorous. Emma also felt excitement run through her body. The brunette was very closed off with most and yet she was showing Emma a whole new side of her. A small part of her was fearful for the same reason. Regina never showed this side so for her to do so meant something was going on. But she left it alone. The older woman would tell her when she saw fit.

“Thank you for helping me out,” Emma turned to face her completely and Regina felt the pain in her chest subside for a brief moment, “Listen, I’m taking this week off of work and I wanted to hang out with Henry. I’m thinking camping and some traveling. I was wondering if you’d like to tag along? Just you, me, and our son?”

Regina’s jaw dropped. The Sheriff was proposing a week of family time, just the three of them. No Snow or Charming or seven dwarfs. Just them. It sounded amazing and the brunette’s immediate knee jerk reaction was to say yes. But she worried about Henry and if he would want her around. Probably not so she replied, “I don’t think Henry would like that.”

“I don’t give a damn,” Regina startled. She hadn’t expected such a strong response, “He loves you but he’s being stubborn. Come with us. Yes, he’ll be an ass at first but you keep on it and you guys can reconcile. Come on, Regina, we’ll work on him together.” 

The blonde grabbed one of Regina’s hands and cradled it in between her own in an attempt to persuade the woman with her touch. Regina was shocked to hear Emma say those words. They had fought and groveled for Henry because, at the time, they believed it was one or the other. Emma was demonstrating that it never had to be that way and that saddened the brunette. There was the pain again. 

She had a million reasons to say no but she couldn’t pass up the opportunity to make amends with the two people she needed forgiveness from before she died, “Alright. I’d like that. Just us.”

“Great! Don’t worry; I’ll start working on the kid tonight after dinner. It’s going to be so much fun! I’m talking camping, maybe a trip to Boston so I could show you where I lived and my favorite restaurants, and we could go see the Sox’s!” Emma explained animatedly, her arms waving excitedly. Regina couldn’t contain the bright smile that filtered through her defenses. When had Emma become so… cute? 

Regina’s smile slowly wavered as she wondered how she would deal with her affliction during their weeklong adventure. Her bouts of lethargy were debilitating. She realized that she needed to confess to Emma sooner rather than later. 

~_~_~

Dinner was awkward to say the least. Snow and Charming shot her disappointed looks and Henry was extremely quiet. She just hoped that her parents hadn’t talked shit while she was gone. They just sat there, stiff, eating their dinner. The only sounds in the room were the scraping of forks against plates and Snow clearing her throat incessantly. Emma kept her eyes down but she could feel her father’s eyes on her. 

Snow cleared her throat loudly again and Emma rolled her eyes, “Something in your throat Snow? Why don’t you sip some water or something? I’m thoroughly irritated if that’s what you’re going for.” 

Henry stifled a laugh and Emma looked over at him, shocked that he would find her attitude towards his grandparents humorous. He threw her a small smile and her jaw dropped. Snow and Charming were too busy to notice the exchange as they were hurriedly whispering back and forth.

“I’m done so I’m just going to going upstairs to listen to music.” Henry stated as he dropped his fork onto his plate along with his napkin. He quickly dumped his pleat onto the counter and practically flew up the stairs. Emma cursed the kid for leaving her alone to fend off her parents. 

“Emma,” Speak of the devils, “We have to discuss something with you. We need you to know where we’re coming from.”

“Look, I know how you guys feel about this. I know how I feel about it. I’m not changing my mind. You won’t be able to so drop it. We’ll agree to disagree.” Emma stated calmly, pushing peas around her plate and ignoring their piercing gazes. 

“Regina is—“

“Get off my back!” Emma shrieked with frustration, jumping out of her chair and running to out the door. She plopped down on the steps outside of the apartment door. She knew that they wouldn’t come after her so she stayed close because she still needed to talk to Henry about their plans. What really bothered her about this stupid battle with her parents was that she could see a future with Regina and she knew that if she went forward with her plans to woo the brunette, her parents would be an obstacle. She just hoped that when they learned of her feelings, they would back off because this friction was too much for her. She heard the apartment door swing open and she groaned, obviously expecting one of her parents.

“Hey Ma.” She smiled at her son’s voice and turned her head to see him taking a seat on the step next to her. 

“Hey kid,” She propped her chin on her palm, “You heard?”

Henry sighed, “I get what you were saying earlier. They are biased and I shouldn’t have abandoned my mom, especially because she’s always waiting for people to leave her. I did that and I hurt her.”

Emma smiled proudly, “You’re a great kid, Henry. And don’t worry, we’ll make this right.”

“I love her. I’m still angry,” Emma nodded, “But I need to give her a second chance, just like I’m hoping she’ll give me my nine hundredth chance.”

“She really raised you right.” Emma whispered, feeling her throat constrict and fought to keep tears at bay. Henry chuckled.

“She was a great mom. It shouldn’t have mattered that she didn’t give birth to me. I see that now. Like you said, I want to fix things. We can be a family.”


	4. Breakdown

Regina noticed a pattern, one that would be beneficial to the vacation plans. Her bouts of fatigue and energy alternated every twelve hours and, usually, the fatigue began around midnight and lasted until noon and the energy would have her bouncing off the walls and feeling happy from noon to midnight. It was a tiring cycle but it allowed for Regina to enjoy her adventure with her son and Emma. Also, she figured, it made it easier to hide. 

Regina slowly climbed out of bed and trekked to the restroom. Yes, she had too much energy coursing through her system but her body had been practically paralyzed for several hours and she wasn’t a young buck. Her joints and muscles protested loudly with her knees cracking, her back aching, and her shoulder blades burning. She had to prepare for Emma’s inevitable visit so she gyrated her neck, hips, and ankles in an attempt to shake off the aches and pains. 

As she brushed her teeth, she mentally went over what she had discovered about her affliction. One, she had several weeks, or less, to live until her heart cracked completely. Two, the bouts of fatigue and energy lasted twelve hours and alternated every morning and evening. Three, the fatigue brought on a depressed mood and negative memories while the energetic bout brought on excessive cheerfulness and positive memories. Regina had read more of the book after Emma had left the night before and she discovered that the alternation between positive and negative imagery was supposed to balance your psyche before you croak. Or something equally outlandish and stupid. Although, Regina did look forward to the bursts of energy because it brought forth memories of her father, her son, and Daniel that she had long forgotten. The book also said that the death and days prior would be excruciatingly painful. While she hated that they didn’t sugarcoat it a bit, because damn, Regina couldn’t help but agree. Your heart being snapped in two sounded pretty uncomfortable. 

She felt fear rise in her belly and quickly screwed her eyes shut, “Don’t worry about that now.”

She had a few weeks to live life like she always should have and she wasn’t planning to spend it in fear of what was to come. She needed to push thoughts and worries about her inevitable death to the backburner and live in the moment. She needed to make things right with Henry and Emma, possibly Snow and Charming. She needed to make arrangements too. But all that could wait until their little weeklong adventure was over. 

Regina rinsed her mouth before strolling back into the bedroom and slipping on comfortable jeans and a red sweatshirt. Hell, if she was going to kick the bucket, she was going to wear comfortable clothes and forget about every lesson Cora had tried to beat into her. She would slouch, eat way too much food and scarf down Tums tablets, ride a horse like a man again, and maybe even smile genuinely, open up to her son, and just be herself. 

No, she would not spend her last weeks being the woman Cora conditioned. She would beat her mother and her bout of lethargy and negative memories. She would wake up every morning and keep moving forward. She needed to keep this attitude of she was going to do everything she wanted. She needed to truly be Regina Mills, no more walls or masks or facades. The brunette looked at herself in the mirror and actually smiled at what she saw. 

She would have never guessed that her death would bring her such life. 

~_~_~

“Henry! Get your flat ass down here!” Emma hollered from the kitchen of the apartment, organizing her money in her wallet as she waited. That morning, Henry had asked to see his mother and Emma was so damn excited by the prospect that she immediately dressed and hurried her son. Whenever they left, she rolled her eyes at her son’s snail pace; they would head to Granny’s and pick up some lunch before heading to Mifflin. 

“Alright, alright! I’m done!” Henry yelled back as he raced down the steps to meet his Ma by the front door, “How come we had to wait until lunchtime though?”

“Your grandparents would’ve be all over us like vultures if we tried to sneak out this morning,” Emma sighed, squeezing her sons shoulder as she lead him down the stairs, “Plus, I think I heard your mom say that she enjoyed lunch more than breakfast. Something about eating so early making her nauseous.”

“Really? But she always made breakfast when I lived there and she always ate something with me. She always used to say how much she loved it.” Henry scrunched his brows as they hopped into the Bug. Emma smiled, knowing why Regina had done it.

“Kid, she wanted to please and spend time with you. She didn’t enjoy the food. She enjoyed being with you.” Emma responded and watched Henry’s face fall. She suddenly felt bad for making the kid feel guilty. She reached over and ruffled his hair but his expression stayed the same. She sighed. 

“She loves burgers. She’ll deny it to her dying breath but she used to make it for herself when I was a kid. It was one of the only foods she literally stuffed her face with.” Henry allowed a small sad smile to appear and Emma furrowed her brows, confused by the turn of the conversation and the statement itself.

“I’ve never seen her eat a burger. She always chewing on leaves.” Emma stated as she made a left turn. Henry frowned again.

“Yeah, she stopped after I…” Henry’s sentence faded but Emma knew exactly what he meant. Regina really lost a lot when Henry pulled away from her; not just her son’s affection but she lost interest in her favorite things.

 

“So, what’d you say we buy her a burger and some fries?” Emma smiled as Henry’s face lit up.

“She used to drown the fries in ketchup too,” The boy laughed, seemingly lost in a memory. Emma gestured with her hand, urging him to tell her what was so funny, so Henry added, “One time she made us homemade burgers and fries but when she opened the fridge, the ketchup was practically empty. She was so desperate for anything she could get from the bottle so she flipped it over and shook hard. All of a sudden, the cap snaps open and a stream of ketchup splatters all over her new white dress and her entire face. She looked so shocked and we just died laughing. I don’t think I’ve seen her laugh like that since.”

Emma wiped at her eyes, tearing up from laughter. She could imagine the scene and Regina’s cute and very grumpy pout at the destruction of her clothes, “Maybe you’ll hear it again this week.”

Henry nodded and his smile widened as he watched houses and buildings fly by through the window. Emma couldn’t stop imagining Regina’s face as ketchup flew all over her and the blonde burst out laughing all over again, her eyes blurring a bit. Henry’s chuckles joined in a few seconds after and they smiled all the way to the mansion.

Emma parked the Bug in the driveway but before she could even unbuckle her seatbelt, Henry was already halfway to the front door. Emma reached for the food and followed her son’s path as he knocked on the large white door. They both furrowed their brows and threw each other questioning looks when they heard thumping coming towards the door but it lacked the usual snap of heels. They heard a gasp and the blonde knew that Regina probably peek through the peephole and saw her son. A few moments later, the brunette opened the door and simply stared at Henry with wide eyes.

“Mom,” Henry stepped forward and placed his small hand on Regina’s bicep, “I’m sorry.”

Regina blinked repeatedly, as if confused and surprised at the same time, “You’re sorry?”

“We both are.” Emma added, her eyes sincere. Regina shook her head and opened her mouth to refute but instead chose to usher them in, giving Emma’s hand a grateful squeeze. Before she could turn back to sneak a peak at her son, Henry plowed into her and hugged her tight. Regina immediately wrapped her arms around his small form, holding on so tight that he let out a strangled groan. 

“Mom!” His voice muffled by her bosom. Emma watched, holding in a laugh.

“Gina, let the kid breathe.” The blonde let out a chuckle when Regina glared at her playfully. The brunette let Henry go but the boy kept an arm around her midsection as Regina led them to the study. The blonde announced that she would be in the garden getting fresh air so that the mother and son could talk. Once the door behind Emma clicked shut, Regina turned to face Henry and sighed.

“I want to apologize for lying to you and for making you feel crazy. I regret it everyday. I was and am a damaged woman, Henry. I’ve lived a twisted life and unfortunately I went about everything the wrong way. The first time I felt complete was when you were put in my arms and I loved you so much. When you pulled away from me, I was devastated. Then you brought Emma here and I couldn’t let her break the curse because I knew that if she did, you would hate me even more than you had. I panicked and I dug myself into a darker hole. But I’m done making excuses and I just want you to know that I don’t expect forgiveness but I’d like to express how sorry I am anyway.” Regina ended her monologue with a deep breath, her hands wringing nervously.

“I forgive you mom,” Regina felt her lungs seize with relief, “I love you and I shouldn’t have left you and treated you badly. For that, I’m sorry. I hope you’re not mad.”

“I wasn’t mad at you, just extremely… heartbroken.” Regina stated ironically, cringing at her own choice of words. He didn’t seem to notice and she relaxed. 

“Let’s put all of this behind us and have fun on our trip!” His smile made her heart palpitate and for the first time in days, it wasn’t painful. He was her little prince and she hoped that he continued to grow into a smart, mature gentleman. She may not be able to attend his wedding or meet her grandchildren but she would take pleasure in knowing that the man he becomes is partly because of her. She felt tears burning her eyes and bit her tongue roughly to drown out the emotion with the pain. Again, he didn’t notice, as he was too excited and halfway to the garden to retrieve his other mother. Earlier, she decided that she wouldn’t tell Henry about her illness until her last few days but she would inform Emma so that she could understand her issues during the trip if something were to arise. 

She was brought out of her thoughts by a hand waving in front of her face, “Hey, where’d you go?”

Regina threw Emma an unsure smile, “There’s something I have to tell you but Henry can’t know.”

“What is it?” Regina scoped out the room, trying to find her son, “He went upstairs to read some comics so we could talk. I kinda wanted to apologize for my part in fucking up your relationship with our son.”

Regina patted Emma’s hand and nodded her head as an acceptance, “Thank you and I suppose it was fifty-fifty so I own up to my part of it.”

“Nice,” Emma smiled goofily, “So what’s up?”

Regina cleared her throat and stared at the blonde’s knees, not wanting to see her reaction, “Two days ago, when you came back, being excluded from the group after saving you really hurt me—“

“I’m—“

“Emma, please. I came home and I lost my mind, as you saw, but I was also feeling an excruciating pain in my chest so when you left, I called Rumple. He checked my heart and he said that I had a magical illness called a broken heart.”

“Are you okay?” Emma shrieked, looking at Regina’s chest for any imperfections. Regina cursed as her throat constricted and her eyes burned.

“I asked you for my mothers books so that I could research it. I found that it’s incurable. I have a few weeks to live.” Regina finally lifted her glistening eyes to take in the blonde, who was gaping at her silently. The brunette cleared her throat and the loud sound broke Emma out of her stupor.

“You-You’re… No,” Emma whispered, tears hanging off of her lashes, “This isn’t funny, okay?”

Regina felt a sib crawling up her throat, “I wish I could say I was joking but I’m not. I spend half of the day extremely fatigue and then I have a burst of energy for the rest. Rumple estimated that I have a few weeks and we’ll know when I enter my final days because the pain will become overwhelming and debilitating. I don’t want Henry to know. I want our vacation to be fun, not sad.”

“Regina, you can’t… you can’t leave us. We just made amends.” The blonde hiccupped, her cheeks and ears red with emotion. A few tears fell, dropping to mar her jeans. Regina screwed her eyes shut, willing the image of a distraught blonde away. 

“Let’s enjoy our camping trip and our visit to see the Red Sox’s. I’ve never slept in a tent or watched basketball live. It’ll be an adventure and it’s exactly how I want to spend my last weeks.”

“Baseball,” Emma managed a weak smile at her mistake, “The Red Sox’s play baseball, not basketball.”

“As if it matters.” Regina chuckled nasally but Emma couldn’t bring herself to join in. She couldn’t believe what was happening. Just that morning, she was thinking about her relationship with Regina, hoping for a future with her. Emma reached up to rub her temples.

“There had to be something we can do, Regina. A potion or something?” Emma pleaded, her eyes begging for an answer. 

“There’s nothing,” Regina replied softly before clearing her throat and jumping up to escape the sad atmosphere that descended upon them, “Let’s not worry about it. We should get our son and discuss our plans for the week.”

Regina shuffled out the study and made her way upstairs to retrieve their son. Emma couldn’t move or think. She was stunned and her heart was in her stomach. This couldn’t be happening. It couldn’t. 

Emma let out a quiet sob as she let her tears fall. Because no matter how much she wished, this was happening and Emma was lost.


	5. Camping (Part 1): Enjoyment

“Have you ever been camping?” Emma questioned the brunette in the passenger seat, their son strapped in tight in the back and their gear packing the Bug to the brim.

Regina pursed her lips, “Depends on what you consider camping. One time Snow cared for me in a makeshift tent in the Enchanted Forest. We didn’t have sleeping bags though and those twigs poked places shrubbery should never touch.”

Henry chuckled, “That doesn’t count! You didn’t fish or make s’mores or tell ghost stories.”

After dropping the bomb on Emma, Regina had retrieved Henry and sat him down at the table before going to comfort the blonde, who was a mess. It took ten minutes to calm her and an extra five to make her presentable again. As they sat at the table, they agreed to have a camping trip first and then a trip to Boston and New York. Regina seemed excited but Emma was downtrodden. She had no idea how she was going to play happy families when the brunette was dying. They had talked about it incessantly because Emma had to know everything. The fact that she cared so much and was so affected made Regina wonder what the hell they had been waiting for. 

“Honestly? I didn’t even know that Storybrooke had a campground.” Regina peered out the window and watched the unfamiliar buildings fade to trees. 

“Didn’t you create this town?” Emma snorted, her excitement about this trip was bubbling up and showing through her slightly high-pitched voice.

“Actually Rumple designed most of it,” Regina turned to look at the driver, “I added some things and was the caster, dear.”

“Huh, the more you know.” Emma teased, taking her right hand off of the steering wheel to poke Regina’s shoulder playfully. The brunette landed a resounding smack onto the hand annoying her and Emma hissed before pouting. Regina couldn’t hold in the smile that appeared after witnessing Emma’s cute yet grumpy facial expression. She leaned over to rub circles over the offending hand and patted it mockingly, garnering her a lighthearted glare. 

“How much longer?” Henry whined from the backseat, his thumbs slamming on his handheld gaming device rapidly. Regina propped her elbow on the car door and used her palm to hold up her head.

“Yes, Emma, are we there yet?” Regina made sure to imitate their son and Emma released a bark of laughter.

“Relax children. We’ve only got five more minutes until we reach the parking lot,” Emma rubbed her upper lip with trepidation, “Then from the parking, it’s a mile hike to the private campground.”

Regina turned to look at the blonde slowly, “A mile hike, Miss Swan?”

“Aw come on, I’ve been demoted to Miss Swan?” Emma joked and Regina tilted her head. Emma sighed, admitting defeat, “Yeah, I know, I know. It’s a long hike for an out of shape woman and a child but—“

A swift smack to the bicep caused Emma to shriek and Henry to giggle like the child he was supposed to be. Regina pouted, “I have a good figure.”

Emma’s eyes roamed over the brunette’s figure appreciatively, “I’m inclined to agree but when was the last time you worked out or had a nice long walk?”

Regina blushed, “Shut up, Miss Swan.”

“Oh! You’re breaking my heart, Gina.” Emma clutched a hand on her chest and pretended to be wounded. Regina chuckled at the dramatics until she saw the blonde’s smile rapidly diminish. Regina quirked a brow and Emma simply looked forward as she patted her chest knowingly. The older woman frowned, upset that Emma was thinking about her affliction. She knew it was hard to forget such… tragic… news but she didn’t want Emma to dwell on it. She knew that the blonde was feeling guilty, as if her joke offended Regina, so the brunette reached over and gently caressed the back of Emma’s right hand for a few comforting seconds before pulling away. The younger woman threw her a grateful smile. 

The tree’s started to thin out and the dirt path slowly widened to show a concrete parking lot. Emma took the closest free spot to the entrance of the trail and clapped her hands, “Ready campers?”

“Woo!” Henry shouted as he hopped out of the car and ran to open the trunk. Emma and Regina followed quickly and helped Henry unload their bags. Regina handed Henry his blue bag filled with food, water, and other necessary materials. The brunette, sporting tight purple active wear and black sneakers, lifted her bag with a grunt and swung it onto her shoulders. Emma followed and once her bad was securely strapped onto her back, she locked the car and stored the keys in one of the zipper compartments in Regina’s bag. 

“Alright, you guys ready to go?” When she received two nods, one an excited bounce and the other a nervous bob to the side, Emma gestured towards the trail. She proclaimed, “Kid, head up the front so we can keep an eye on you.”

Henry turned and scoped out the beginning of the trail as Regina asked, “You go behind Henry?”

“No, no, it’s children first, elderly second, and the perky blonde’s third.” Regina gaped, letting out a surprised puff of air, as Emma quirked a brow tauntingly. 

“I can and will hurt you.” Regina warned but her small smile gave away her true feelings.

Emma laughed and adjusted her bag straps self-consciously as a blush emerged, “It’s not really about age. I just want to have a perfect view of your good figure for the next hour or so.”

Emma winked and Regina smirked mischievously as she twirled and swayed over to their son, adding extra movement to her hips for Emma’s benefit. She bit her lip, allowing her eyes to take in Madame Mayor in tight spandex that showed off her round ass and delectable breasts. She had a feeling she was going to enjoy camping just a little too much. 

~_~_~

Emma wasn’t an idiot, no matter how much Regina kept claiming so throughout the mile hike. This campground would be worth the trek. Plus, she wasn’t huffing and puffing like her counterparts so she had been right. Regina began groaning five minutes into the walk, complaining about the uneven terrain and almost twisting her ankle a hundred different times. Henry kept asking how much farther while kicking rocks grumpily. While their whining should’ve been irritating, Emma couldn’t help but feel warmth in her chest. This was her family, flaws and all. 

“Are we there yet?” The boy cried, his arms swinging in frustration. 

“This is ridiculous. Why the hell did I agree to this?” Regina grumbled as she tried to climb over a large log, almost managing to fall off. Emma chuckled under her breath. The mother and son duo were like petulant children and the blonde couldn’t keep the grin off of her face.

“We’re almost there. I promise. And you’re both going to love it.” Just as the words registered in Regina and Henry’s ears, a clearing came into view and they both let out a cry of happiness. Emma jogged towards the area. It was large with smooth grass and a large, clear lake off to the right with a beautiful dock and a slide. Henry’s eyes grew so wide, Emma feared for his health. Regina had a serene smile on her face, the triumph of surviving the trek seeping into her eyes and posture.

“Whoa! Look at the slide mom!” Henry grabbed Regina’s hand and practically dragged her to the humongous dock so that they could touch the water, testing its temperature, and inspecting the slide. The blonde felt her eyes burn as she watched the reunited pair talk animatedly and hold hands. This was how their unit should’ve always been, cohesive and content. Emma couldn’t stop thinking about Regina’s mortality. It was gnawing at her. There had to be something she could do to save the brunette but, for now, she was going to enjoy the view.

“Come here Ma, there’s fishes!” Henry bellowed, his frantic excitement nearly sending him into the water but Regina’s quick reflexes saved his scrawny ass. 

Emma walked towards them, “Yeah, they’re for fishing. You catch them and throw them back in.”

“Do we have fishing poles?” Regina asked as she covered her eyes from the sun with her dainty hand. Emma nodded.

“I was able to fit two compact poles into my bag.” Emma watched as the brunette removed her sneakers and dipped her toe into the water before plopping down on the deck and emerging her legs. Henry and Emma followed her lead, with their son in between them. Regina interlaced her fingers with Henry’s right hand and Emma draped her arm across their son’s shoulders. Both mothers wished they could snap a photo of this moment but Emma outstretched her arm and attempted to conjure the camera that was packed away. Regina watched proudly as the device appeared and Henry gasped.

“Ma! You can do magic?” His jaw was slack and his eyes wide.

“Yeah, kid, my magic protected me from Cora and I kinda realized that it could be helpful to have. Don’t worry though, your mom’s teaching me the right way so I’ll be fine. Is that okay with you?” Emma managed to handle the situation beautifully as Henry just nodded seriously. Regina felt relief. If she was going to die, she needed to know that the sheriff could protect their son using the strongest means possible. 

Emma’s arm that was around Henry pulled him closer and her fingers massaged the brunette’s shoulder, urging her closer. Once they were all mushed together, Emma reached out her left arm and took several pictures. They came out so perfect that the blonde couldn’t stop staring at it.

“This is what I want,” Both mothers turned to glance at their son questioningly, “I want you guys to get along and I want us to be together like this.”

“I want that too, my little prince.” Regina passed her fingers through his uneven bangs lovingly. Emma just watched solemnly, hoping that they would have decades together instead of a few weeks. 

~_~_~

“Reel it in! Reel it in!” Emma yelled excitedly as Henry furiously worked to catch the first fish of the night. Regina chuckled from her perch on the rainbow colored beach chair Emma had set up on the dock for her. 

“It’s a big one! I can feel it!” He gritted his teeth and bent his knees, his arm continuing to work on the fishing pole as the creature pulled on the line. Henry tugged and tugged until the fish gave up its fight and sent the boy flying backwards, landing on his ass. Regina and Emma burst out laughing when Henry lifted his catch only to see a piece of moss hanging limply from his line.

“Oh, kid,” Emma giggled, holding her sides, before grabbing the pole from his hands, “Why don’t you go and put on your bathing suit?”

“If you can’t catch them, swim with them.” Regina quipped as she rose from the chair and wiped her backside of dirt. Emma grinned before lifting her hand and holding up the fishing pole, urging the brunette towards her.

“Come on, Gina, give it a go.” Emma continued grinning as Regina swiped the pole from her hand with superiority. 

“I’ll have you know that my daddy taught me how to fish in the Enchanted Forest. So, I’m fairly confident that I could do better than our prepubescent son.” The brunette stated haughtily as she set the pole up for another round.

“Whatever you say, your majesty.” But before Regina could even attempt, the women heard the staccato beat of little feet pounding on the dock and turned just in time to see their son barrel into them. The three went flying into the lake, shrieking and waving their arms desperately. They surfaced to Henry’s joyful peals of laughter and the two women had to join in, adding some splashing as payback. After ten minutes of revenge, Emma and Regina floated at the other end of the lake while Henry slid down the slide enthusiastically. 

“He’s having way too much fun.” Emma chuckled as Henry went down the slide headfirst, ending in a perfect dive. 

“I know,” Regina smiled brightly, “Isn’t it great?”

“Yeah, making him happy is one of the two things I strive for.” Emma stated, peeking at the brunette, practically begging Regina to ask what the other thing was. The older woman took the bait.

“What’s the second?” Regina asked absentmindedly, keeping a close eye on Henry to make sure he didn’t do anything reckless. 

“Making you happy.” Emma grinned when Regina scoffed playfully.

“How charming.” She splashed some water towards the blonde. Her heart filled with joy at Emma’s admission but she was afraid to get in too deep when her life was almost over. She had nothing to offer the blonde; no future or joyous acceptance of their possible relationship from her loved ones. Emma deserved someone that could cherish her until the end. A few weeks was not enough for either woman and Regina couldn’t allow Emma to love her. She couldn’t get a taste only to lose it. 

“Regina,” Emma cradled the brunette’s jaw adoringly, “I will find a way to fix this. I can’t lose you, not now. Not when I’ve just realized—“

“Moms! I’m hungry.” Emma sighed as Regina grabbed her hand, caressing the back with her thumb, before swimming off. Emma couldn’t help but curse the kid’s stomach. 

~_~_~

“My God, this is delicious!” Regina whispered in awe as she munched on her first s’more and her son and… Emma nodded their heads eagerly. 

“We had them during a school trip once but I haven’t had one since.” Henry added before chowing down on another section of the treat. Emma, as usual, was silent, too consumed with her food to notice her surroundings. 

“We should make these at home one day.” Regina licked some chocolate from her finger.

“Really?” Henry asked excitedly and smiled when Regina nodded seriously. Emma swallowed her last piece before sighing and rubbing her tummy. 

“I’m going to set up the tents. Eat as much as you like.” Emma ruffled Henry’s hair as she departed to their forgotten bags to retrieve the folded tents. Regina reached for another graham cookie and broke off a piece of chocolate and ate it without the marshmallow. 

Henry cleared his throat, “I’ve had a really good time today. I’ve missed you.” 

“I’ve missed you too, so much.” Regina saw her vision blur and quickly blinked away her tears. She managed a shaky smile before shoving the cracker into her mouth. She turned to watch Emma move on to the second tent, allowing her eyes to roam over the blonde’s athletic figure. 

“Are you excited for Boston and New York?” Henry asked as he popped a marshmallow into his mouth. 

“I suppose. I’ve been to Boston before but I learned that I don’t fins the appeal of the big city.”

“So what would you like to do?”

“When you were three, the television calmed you so I spent hours watching mindless programming. I would see commercials for Six Flags Great Adventure and I always wanted to go. We’ve never been to an amusement park.” Regina heard a gasp and turned to see Emma gaping with a hand over her heart.

“You guys haven’t been to an amusement park?” The blonde gasped again when they nodded, “That’s it. We’re not going to Boston or New York. We must go to Six Flags! New Jersey, here we come!” 

Regina chuckled, “Let’s survive camping first, dear.”

“Yeah, yeah. Anyway, one of the tents is missing a piece so two of us have to share.”

“I call the solo!” Henry jumped from his chair and sprinted to the red tent as his mothers stuttered after him. Regina zipped open the red tent to glare at her son.

“Mom, go for it.” He whispered and Regina froze.

“Excuse me?” Henry smiled knowingly.

“You like her and she likes you.” Regina let out a surprised chuckle and stared at her son’s overly confident smirk. She wanted to deny his allegations but she couldn’t lie to him, not again. He was an intuitive boy and he saw the signs. She had to admit that they weren’t exactly subtle as they assumed Henry wouldn’t come to the conclusion that they were romantically interested in each other. They honestly should’ve known better. 

“Go mom.” He whispered, his smirk diminished and his hope dwindling. Regina sent him a shaky smile before kissing his forehead and wishing him goodnight. She zipped up his tent and turned to see Emma standing by the blue tent, staring at her expectantly. 

Well, so much for avoidance.


	6. Camping (Part 2): Pleas

They were lying next to one another in the blue tent, managing to create some space between them. Even though Emma wanted to be close to the other woman, she knew Regina wasn’t in the right mindset for anything too forward so she gave the brunette a large portion of the tent and turned onto her side, using her elbow to prop up her head. Emma could tell that Regina was tense, waiting for the blonde to do or say something, anything that would indicate how their night would go. 

“Today was fun. I had a really nice time,” Emma whispered and watched as some of Regina’s tension decreased, “I was worried about you two divas but you guys did pretty good.”

“We did well, Miss Swan.” Regina corrected with a soft smile. She felt relieved that the blonde was treading in safe territory. She also appreciated the fact that Emma understood her and her moods. Her smile widened a bit.

“Yeah, yeah, grammar queen,” Emma coughed from a sudden chill and the brunette quickly offered some of the wool blanket, “Thanks. Anyway, did you have fun? Camping isn’t for everyone.”

“I have to say that this experienced reminded me a lot of home, the good parts of it anyway. And being with Henry like this was amazing. I never thought he would be this way with me ever again,” Regina paused before peering at the blonde, “And I enjoyed your company as well, Emma. You’ve been very kind to me these past few days and I appreciate your efforts.”

Emma chuckled faintly, “Wow, you called me Emma? I’m really moving on up, aren’t I?” 

“Don’t get too cocky, dear.” Regina snorted, her eyes twinkling at the banter. They had always had such a comical way of speaking to one another but before, it was filled with malice. This was light hearted and calm.

Emma smirked juvenilely before whispering, “You like me.”

Regina let out an uncharacteristic giggle and turned onto her side to face the blonde, “I have come to realize that I enjoy your company, but don’t let it go to your head.”

“I like you too, Regina.” The blonde whispered and Regina avoided her meaningful stare by picking at a loose strand from the blanket. The brunette coughed uncomfortably, unsure what to say or do. She was so conflicted. Emma was kind and on her side but she deserved someone better, someone light. 

Regina sighed, “In an hour, I’ll become extremely fatigued. Don’t be frightened.”

Emma gulped, trying to open up her airway. The blonde was afraid to see Regina deteriorate. She witnessed it the days before but actually caring for the woman was her responsibility now. She just wished she could take this away from her, take the pain away. For now, all she could do was change the subject.

“So Six Flags, huh?” Emma smirked uneasily, “I lived in Jersey for a while when I was young and I actually slept in the Fantasy Forest and stole food from The Yum Yum Café. I was about fifteen at the time and I was actually pretty content living there under the radar. There was a janitor that spoke only Spanish and he knew where I hid until the park closed down. He would make sure to leave some locks open so that I could get around easier.”

Regina smiled, “So good memories of the park?”

“Only the best. The workers pretended not to know and they made my life easier. For a while, when I turned eighteen, I thought about moving to Jersey because it was quiet but not too quiet, ya know?”

“Storybrooke quiet? Because there are times when my mind needs to be drowned out by traffic or cursing or anything really.” Regina joked and Emma let out a bark of laughter, her forearm falling to the ground and her head supported by her bicep. 

“Depends where you go. The north is more like a city with bustling suburbs. The south is farmland. I got kicked out of Six Flags when a manager was doing his last minutes checks and caught me red handed with a piece of steak in my mouth. After that, I went up north and lived in Newark for a while but it became too dangerous there, murder rate was real high. I actually witnessed a cop being shot, traumatized me bad. Anyway, after Newark, I was caught by social services and sent away again. I always wanted to return to Six Flags to, you know, see if Manny, the janitor, still worked there and if the place changed but I got caught up by life. I guess you could say that this trip to Jersey is as much for me as it is for you guys.” 

Regina had stayed silent, soaking up all the information and digesting it. She felt guilty that Emma’s life had spiraled because of her and her vendetta. She had had good parents in Snow and Charming. She ruined Emma’s chance at a perfect childhood. Regina added those points to the ever-growing list of reasons they shouldn’t be together. However, if she was going to go, she needed to make amends and Emma deserved her apologies the most. 

“I’m sorry that my curse put your parents in that situation. You’re childhood, from what you’ve told me, seemed awful and I wanted to take complete responsibility for it. Your parents, they loved you, and I ruined you life. So… I’m truly sorry Emma, for taking away your best chance.” Regina blew out an unstable breath that ended sharply. The blonde was crying, sobbing quietly really, and the brunette reached forward to caress Emma’s shoulder comfortingly. She was unsure if the gesture was wanted but she felt compelled to sooth the sheriff.

Emma sucked in a breath and wiped furiously at her eyes, “You’re not completely responsible. They chose to send me away to save themselves. But I’ve let that go because all it will do is eat me from the inside out and I have Henry to think about… and you. I… Regina, you don’t want you to feel guilty about the past, not with me. Right now, I’m choosing to judge you solely on your current actions and you’ve been amazing so…”

The conversation faded and the two simply shared coy smiles before Emma pushed her body up off the ground and extended a hand in invitation. Regina furrowed her brows, “What’re you doing?”

“You have,” She checked her watch, “forty minutes to soak up what’s left of this camp before the paralysis thing starts and I plan to help you enjoy them.”

Regina didn’t reply but accepted the outstretched hand and allowed Emma to pull her to her feet, “Lead the way, Sheriff.”

The blonde dragged Regina to the lake and plopped down a few feet from the edge of the dock, her legs spread. She patted the spot between her thighs and lightly pulled on their connected hands, urging the brunette to comply. Regina pursed her lips, unsure what to do. The position was considered to be extremely intimate but she wanted to be held so badly. It was a bit pathetic, really. No one had ever held her. Her mother used to say that women weren’t dolls to be carried around like helpless damsels and forced her father to avoid soothing touches. Daniel enjoyed kissing and handholding. Leopold enjoyed forcing her into his bed and throwing her away like a used rag when he was finished. Graham was all about sex. He stayed some nights but he never showed her affection. 

But Emma was offering to cuddle with her in the moonlight by a beautiful lake… willingly. It had her broken heart flutter with joy and she couldn’t refuse. She slowly lowered herself in between Emma’s milky thighs, pressing her back to the blonde’s front and placing her hands on the other woman’s bent knees. Emma wrapped her arms around Regina’s midsection tightly and propped her chin on the brunette’s right shoulder. 

After a few moments of serenity, Emma whispered, “Everything’s going to be okay. I won’t stop until her healthy again because I’m sure as hell not losing you.”

“Don’t get your hopes up, Emma,” Regina sighed and closed her eyes as she let her head fall back to lay on the blonde’s chest, “I do want you to listen to me right now.”

“Regina—“

“When I go, I want you and Henry to cremate me and put me in a nice urn because I don’t want my burial stone to be vandalized, which is another issue. Protect my home and my vault from the citizens—“

“Regina—“

“And I want you and him to be happy. I want Snow and Charming to be involved in his life. God, saying that is like pulling teeth but they love him and they can help you. I want you to live your life, move on and have fun. I want you to make sure he doesn’t forget me—“

“Regina! Please stop!” Emma yelled, her voice sharp with emotion. Regina flinched but understood that the blonde didn’t want to hear it but she needed to so that when she was gone, they had permission to be happy.

“I just need you to know that it will be okay. It will be okay to laugh and smile and have a good time without me. Don’t feel the need to mourn me for too long or to be upset for feeling happiness without me because that’s what I want. What we started tonight, I want you to continue it. Take him to amusement and water parks, go on a cross country road trip, travel to other continents, let him skip school once in a while, let him eat ice cream for dinner, hug him everyday and kiss him every night, tell him you love him. Give him the childhood we were deprived of.”

Emma tightened her hold on the brunette, nuzzling her face into the brunette’s neck, and Regina felt something wet on her collarbone. She then felt a slight jostling and realized that Emma was crying.

“Please don’t be upset.” She whispered, turning her neck uncomfortably to kiss Emma’s temple. She took a moment to breathe in the blonde’s natural scent, giving the area behind her ear a small kiss, before turning back to the lake. She watched the movement of the water and the shimmering of the moonlight on the surface as she waited for Emma to relax again. She subconsciously began rubbing small circles into the blonde’s right knee with her thumb. 

“I don’t want to hear it,” Emma whispered with a hoarse voice, “I don’t want to hear you talking like that. You’re not dying.”

“Emma—“

“You. Are. Not. Dying.” She emphasized every syllable and, for a moment, she believed it as well, “We will figure this out.” 

Regina just nodded, even though she was extremely skeptical. She would continue scheming up ways to redeem herself, spoiling her son, and living like she, well, there was no tomorrow. Emma was a hero, an optimist. She was running on pure brute force and will. Regina, on the other hand, was a cynic, possibly the worst to grace the realms. She was also a realist. Regina Mills was going to die. There was no question. Emma would not find a miracle way to save her and she would be riding in a Hurst soon. Those were the facts and Regina had accepted them. She couldn’t let Emma’s insistence and pure faith lead her to hope for a way out. It was better to expect the worst so that you aren’t let down. Another thing Cora taught her. That bitch. 

Subject change needed so Regina cleared her throat and whispered evenly, “How are your parents?”

Emma sighed before blowing out a shaky breath, “They’re fine, unfortunately making up for lost time. Henry and I walked in on them post-coital. It was utterly disgusting.” 

Regina groaned, “I didn’t need those images in my head.”

“At least yours is just imagination. I have the image tattooed on the insides of my eyelids.” Emma sounded gravelly, her emotions still unbalanced, and Regina sighed lightly. She wanted the blonde to put their heavy conversation behind them. They only had—she peered at the blonde’s watch—fifteen minutes before the lethargy knocked her down. 

“When your mother was a child, she was a complete brat but, in her own way, she was sweet. I hated her but I loved her at the same time. I always have. That’s why I never managed to kill her, because I didn’t really want her dead. I think deep down I knew that if I killed her, I would become bored with life. I needed her around. I needed someone to hate,” Regina paused, unsure if to reveal this particular secret, but figured that the blonde had revealed a bit of her past so it was only fair. She continued, “The problem was I loved her too much. My mother always said that love was weakness. So, Snow became my greatest weakness and I needed to get rid of her or she would’ve been my downfall. Sometimes, I think back and realize that it wasn’t really about Daniel because he wouldn’t have wanted that. I believe it was my mothers conditioning. Love is weakness.”

“You know she said that to me in Fairytale Land. I saved Snow from her and she called me foolish then said that. But she’s wrong Gina. My love for Snow saved us both. Love is so strong. Love is everything. I was a lot like you, you know? Before I came here, I thought flying solo was the only way to ensure my safety. Then I got here and I met Henry and my parents and you. I realized that that love created roots. It tethered me here and if that isn’t the strongest thing ever I don’t know what is cause let me tell you, I’m a runner. Plus, Snow’s always going on and on about True Love and it’s magic being so powerful. I believe that now because when I look at you, I feel invincible, the angry orphan feels invincible.”

Regina gasped at the allusion that her and Emma were True Loves, “Love is strength.”

“Yeah, I think it is,” Emma playfully shook Regina causing them to sway side-to-side,   
“Your mom was wrong. Being heartless gets you nothing but sadness. Love though? It gives you the world. It did for me.”

“I don’t want to die.” Regina whispered quietly, as if saying it would affect the outcome. Emma smiled sadly.

“Then don’t. Help me fight it.” Regina nodded succinctly, her eyes beginning to burn as she felt her body become extremely weary.

“What time is it?” Emma lifted her hand and checked her watch before cursing quietly.

“Eleven fifty seven. We have three minutes,” Emma whined as she tightened her hold again. Regina chuckled softly, placing her hands over the blonde’s on her abdomen. 

“I already feel exhausted. Maybe we should head to the tent?” Regina turned to place a kiss on Emma’s cheek before attempting to stand from the embrace. Emma simply tugged her back down.

“I’ll carry you later. I just want to talk to you before you start losing your speech,” Regina went to lift herself again but Emma pleaded, “Please?”

The brunette groaned dramatically before throwing a smile Emma’s way to show she wasn’t actually upset, “What do you want to talk about?”

“Tell me a story about Henry as a toddler.” Emma began running her hands over Regina’s tummy causing the brunette to shiver.

Regina took a moment to think before smiling, “When he turned four, I signed him up for school so that he could become president or a doctor or something like that, an occupation that was good enough for my little prince—“

“You’re such a tiger mom.” Emma laughed, her breath caressing the brunette’s ear.

“As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted,” Regina glared impishly, “It was September 5th and we walked to school together, laughing and making fun of the dwarfs. We were both so joyful until the school came into view. He then turned to me and started actually lecturing me on the benefits of homeschooling!”

Emma burst out in laughter, “Sounds like our son!”

“Yes, and I was shocked by his sudden change in attitude. You should know that he spent the whole summer excitedly prophesizing about his class and future friends and teacher so I was floored,” Regina giggled shortly, “It was the way he said it too. Imagine a four year wearing khakis and a sweater, pouting, and saying ‘I’ll have you know that homeschooling has been found to have good results on boys. They tend to love their mommy’s more too’. “

Emma wheezed as her sides began to pinch but she never released her hold on the brunette, “What’d you do?”

“Well, I was frozen. What do you say to that?” Regina let out a bark of laughter that was so melodic and beautiful that Emma wanted to hear it again and again, “But I bent down and explained that there was nothing to be afraid of. You know what he said to me then?”

What?” Emma waited in anticipation, a smile so large it threatened to snap her face in two.

“He said ‘there’s plenty to be afraid of mommy. There’s giant teachers and bullies and mystery lunch’ and I cracked a bit there but,” Regina smiled, “I asked him where he had heard such a thing and he just shrugged and said ‘TV’ like it was obvious and I was a complete ditz.” 

Emma’s body shook as she laughed silently, the sound seized in her lungs. As Emma chuckled and rocked with laughter, Regina felt her tongue clam up and her extremities freeze in place. She managed a groan that broke Emma out of her happiness.

“Regina?” The blonde shifted to look at the brunette, whose eyes were closing and her body tensing. Emma frantically checked her watch. 12:00 pm. Fuck. She screwed her eyes shut to stunt the tears that were gathering. Regina needed her, “It’s okay Regina. Let’s go to bed.”

She felt a barely there nod and quickly lifted the brunette into her athletic arms. She carried her over to the tent and set her down gently, arranging her body into a comfortable position. She then placed herself next to the brunette, borrowing into her side and nuzzling her nose into Regina’s neck. She lifted the brunette’s arm and placed it around her mid-section. 

“I love you, Regina.” She whispered into her neck. She didn’t expect a response but smiled like an idiot when she did.

“Love… you.”


	7. Pardon

Emma yawned as she stretched against Regina’s side. The brunette was groggy but awake and Emma lifted her upper body to place a sweet kiss on Regina’s cheek. The chocolate orbs were twinkling with mirth causing Emma to smile genuinely.

“It’s 11:30 so hang in there,” Emma sighed before chuckling suddenly, “I guess we’re lucky that our son sleeps like a log. He wouldn’t wake up if a marching band passed through the camp playing The Hey Song.” She heard Regina hum melodically. Emma couldn’t help but think that the brunette had meant to chuckle but it came out muted. She saw a look of frustration wash over her face and quickly dispelled it with a line of kisses from the woman’s collarbone to the area below her ear. There was that hum again but this time Emma was sure it was supposed to be a moan. 

Emma sat up, pulling the brunette with her and leaning the older woman’s fit body against her own, “I was placed into the laundry room work duty when I was incarcerated and I actually enjoyed that job because they always placed the less hardcore people in there. I also liked the routine. It was always the same thing over and over. It was kinda relaxing. Anyway, I was folding my load when I got my tests results back from the prison nurse. I had been feeling like utter shit and I went to her. She congratulated me and I was so confused. She then explained that I was pregnant and, for a second, I was so happy, you know?”

She felt Regina nod weakly and continued, “Then I remembered where I was and my heart dropped. Then I thought about where my life would go after I got out and it wasn’t the environment or the life I wanted for my kid. I wanted the baby to have a better home than what I could provide. I was a broke criminal with no education and no skills. I fought with myself for months. I didn’t make up my mind until he was in the doctor’s arms. I realized that I had to give him his best chance at having the life I was denied.”

Emma sucked in a breath, “So I let him go. It hurt so much but I did it for him. When I first met you, I thought I had fucked up big time but now I see, you were and are his best chance. You were the mother we both wanted when we were kids. You were just scared, that’s all. You spent almost three decades as Regina Mills, badass mayor. You didn’t want to be seen as The Evil Queen again. I get it, Gina. It’s like how I don’t want to be thought of as a criminal or a runaway or a flight risk. I just want to be Emma, badass sheriff. I know you think we wouldn’t work but we’re imperfectly perfect for one another because we’ve been through a lot. We need someone who understands. I get you and you get me. And Henry? He gets us both now. This family would be so fucking great as a unit, it makes me want to grab Henry and run to Mifflin and just be with you. Just forget about what everyone thinks and begin the path to our future.”

“That’s highly presumptuous, Miss Swan. We’ve haven’t even kissed properly yet,” Regina’s hoarse voice, both from disuse and emotion, sounded and Emma laughed, knowing that the brunette was teasing her. She pulled back to look into the brown eyes she was becoming addicted to and saw pure adoration directed at her. She smiled happily and Regina added, “I love you, Emma. I thought I should say it properly.”

“I love you too.” Emma whispered, wrapping her arms around the brunette and squeezing her. They suddenly heard a loud groan come from the next tent and chuckled quietly at their son’s grumpy nature in the morning. 

“Ugh, so many mosquitos!” They heard their son grumble and leaned against one another as they tried to keep their laughs silent. 

“Come on, we should pack up and get going. We promised to have lunch with Snow.” Emma stated but didn’t move an inch. 

“Do you mind if I tag along? I need to talk to her.” Regina asked slowly and Emma snapped to look at her with wide eyes. 

“You want to talk to Snow?” Emma asked, amusement coloring her tone. Regina stood up and started to fold her blanket neatly. 

“Yes, I’ve decided to start making amends and Snow is the big one.” The brunette turned to stuff her items into her bag and missed the look of barely concealed agony on the blonde’s face. Regina managed to finish packing before Emma and exited the tent to see Henry deconstructing his tent. He turned and smiled brightly at her.

“Hey mom! How’d you sleep?” Regina walked over to him and helped him collect and pack away the different pieces of the tent.

“I slept well. Thank you for asking,” Regina roughly stuffed a pole into the bag, “How about you?” 

“It was okay. The ground was cold and hard. And the mosquitos were ridiculous!” He yelped, his voice high pitched with disbelief. Regina chuckled. She actually loved when Henry whined childishly. He was such a mature child and he grew up so fast. Regina sometimes missed the tantrums and humorous thought processes. She suddenly smiled as she remembered the story she told Emma the night before. She wanted more moments like that. 

“You are such a diva, Henry!” They heard Emma’s proclamation as she stepped out of the tent with a grin. Regina let out a bark of laughter as Henry stuck out his tongue petulantly. Emma stuck her tongue out as well and they had a bit of a Mexican standoff. 

“Alright, children, let’s get out of here. Snow is waiting on us.” Henry and his blonde mother made comical faces at each other before moving to finish packing.

“You know we have to hike a mile right.” Emma received duel glares and groans. 

~_~_~

The diner was bustling with people. The weekend always managed to pack the establishment, as most were too lazy to cook when they had the day off of work. Emma, Henry, and Regina had passed by the mansion so that everyone could change from their camping clothes into their normal clothing. Regina was much more casual than usual, wearing tight black jeans and a red blouse on top of a thin black camisole. Her boots put her and Emma at the same height level but Emma proclaimed that Regina was still fun-sized. 

Henry walked up to the diner door and held it open for his mothers. He received a smirk from Emma and a cheek pinch from Regina. As soon as the family stepped inside, the diner froze, everyone staring at them wide-eyed. Snow, though, looked disappointed and Emma rolled her eyes as she shuffled her companions towards the booth where her mother was perched. 

“Hey Snow,” Emma stated as she confidently plopped down across from the former bandit, “Did you order yet?”

Snow watched Regina and Henry closely. The boy was peering up at his mother, seemingly checking on her, and Regina looked nervous, which in turn made Snow nervous. She patted the seat next to her and gestured toward her grandson but Regina held him back with a dainty hand on his shoulder.

“Snow, could I speak with you… privately?” Regina stumbled, her voice imperceptibly shaky but Snow knew this woman, knew all her moods. They had lived together for at least ten years and, as a child, she enjoyed being with her stepmother, even though Regina had had the tendency to shut her out. Yes, Snow sensed the anxiety and it made her heart drop. Regina Mills was never scared. 

But Snow decided to dismiss her by stating clinically, “I’m having lunch with my family, Regina. I’m sure whatever you have to say can wait.”

The older brunette seethed internally but Emma caught the slight crinkle of Regina’s nose. She clamed after a moment and tersely begged, “Please Snow.”

The younger brunette’s eyebrows shot up, her mouth hanging open slightly. She was so astonished that she agreed readily, “O-Okay. Lead the way.”

Snow stood and threw Emma a questioning look but the blonde ignored it, staring blankly at the menu. Regina then urged Henry to sit with a gentle push and a small smile. Henry looked at her confused and grabbed her hand. It made Emma smile sadly. The boy, like his blonde mother, barely wanted to leave Regina’s side anymore. She internally cringed as thought about telling him about the broken heart. He was surely going to blame himself and, even now, Emma couldn’t think of a way to placate a pain like that. 

“Go on, sweetheart. Order me something greasy. We’ll be right back.” Henry contemplated for a few more seconds before throwing a terse look at his grandmother, almost like a warning that Snow caught on to quickly. She turned slightly to stare at the boy incredulously. Emma smiled proudly. Her son was looking out for his other mom and she could see that Regina eyes were shining a bit. It had to be the first time in a while, if ever, that Henry actively protected her.

“Come on kid, let them talk.” Emma chuckled, receiving a glare from Snow and a smile from Regina. Henry finally turned away from his grandmother and sat across from Emma. Regina nodded at him and winked before she made her way towards the back of the diner with Snow trailing behind apprehensively. Henry watched them go before turning to his blonde mother seriously.

“What’s going on?” He asked slowly, his expression grim, too grim for such a young boy. Emma opened her mouth to deny anything and everything but he beat her to it, “Don’t lie to me. I’m not dumb. Something happened and I want to know what’s going on.”

Emma sighed, feeling her heart drop, “I’ll talk to your mom.”

“So something is going on with mom?” His voice broke and Emma watched as his knuckles turned white. She leaned forward, dropping the menu, and grabbed his hands.

“Hey, come on, relax. Don’t worry about it right now. I’ll talk to your mom and see if she’s comfortable telling you, okay?” She knew she was being hypocritical by telling her son not to worry considering the fact that this situation was probably giving her an ulcer. But she was the mother and it was her job to make things better. Unfortunately. Emma wasn’t sure she could fix this, no matter how confident she seemed when she scolded Regina. The brunette told her that True Love’s Kiss was the only solution and that the person who broke her heart would most likely be the only one that could fix it, which was complicated. Emma felt that Regina’s heart had been on it’s way to being broken several times so figuring out who exactly threw it into overdrive was difficult. Emma was afraid that it might have been her by taking away Henry and chopping down her tree and the crap from the year before. On the other hand, it could’ve been Henry’s rejection and that was just so much pressure on the kid. Also, what if it was their fault but their love wasn’t enough in the opinion of whatever magical freak made those decisions. What was considered true anyway? 

In the back room, away from prying eyes and ears, Snow and Regina were sitting across from each other awkwardly, their spines rigid and their muscles tense. The younger woman coughed as she smoothed down her yellow cardigan. Why did this woman wear so much pastel? 

“Snow,” Regina began, “I have something to say to you and I know you’ll probably just scoff and roll your eyes when I’m done but I want you to understand that I just want to make amends.”

Snow gasped slightly, her eyes wide, “Make amends?”

“Yes, I’ve realized that family is all I have and you, and Charming, are a part of my family, whether I like it or not. Henry loves you both and I want you to be there for him and for us to be civil. I know I can do it and I…” Regina paused, tilting her head and staring blankly behind Snow. She knew that the next part was going to be difficult and she needed a moment to gather her thoughts.

“When I first met you, as a child, I fell in love with you. I had always wanted a child and you were so sweet and cute and I loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you. Then Daniel was killed because of a mistake you made,” Snow opened her mouth to most likely argue but Regina lifted a hand, “I was angry with my mother but, I think I didn’t want to lose her, so I took it out on you. Cora always said that love was weakness and I truly believed that. Of course, I wasn’t good at living the lesson as I always looked for love and understanding, even if I denied wanting it. I loved you Snow and I needed you gone. You were a weakness. So, I blamed you for everything to fuel my anger, my vendetta. I became someone I always said I wouldn’t. I became Cora.”

“Regina—“ Snow was crying, which wasn’t unusual. Regina skipped over her interruption.

“What I’m trying to say is I’m sorry. I apologize for blaming you for Daniel’s death and for killing your father, he was horrible to me but he was a good father. I apologize for chasing you and threatening your life. I apologize for trying to hurt you, for separating you from your love, and for not taking the chances you and Charming gave me. But most of all, I’m sorry for taking away your chance to raise your little princess. Emma deserved parents like you and you deserved to be a mother, to be like Eva.”

Snow was bawling at this point, her shoulders bouncing as she covered her eyes in embarrassment. Regina’s eyes were burning and she felt her fingers itch to comfort the younger woman but she stayed put, not wanting to overwhelm Snow or herself. 

“I’m sorry about Daniel,” Snow hiccupped, her eyes staring at the carpet, “It was my fault! I should have let you go!”

“You were a child, Henry’s age. I wouldn’t curse my son to a life of misery for something he did at such a young age,” Regina furiously wiped at a traitorous tear that escaped, “I wasn’t a good mother to you. I was too consumed by my own sadness to be a proper parent. I don’t even consider myself your former stepmother. I felt more like a live-in nanny that Leopold hired. Do you understand, Snow? This wasn’t your fault; maybe not even completely mine either. We were screwed over by so many outside factors, like Cora and your father and Fate. Our lives have been one giant convoluted mess. But I forgive you for Daniel and I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me for all of my misdeeds.”

The brunettes looked at one another, as if seeing each other differently or for the first time. Snow smiled sadly before lunging at Regina, hugging her tightly. After a moment of hesitation, the older brunette wrapped her arms around the younger woman. They stayed that way for several minutes with Snow continuing to cry and Regina rubbing soothing circles over the hideous pastel cardigan. 

“I forgive you,” Regina heard Snow’s muffled voice and screwed her eyes shut, “I don’t think I ever hated you. I was just so hurt… because I loved—love— you some much.” 

“I… love you too, Snow.” The older brunette lifted a hand to cradle the younger woman’s head, continuing to comfort with her left hand, “Just don’t promote the fact that I’ve gone soft.”

That made Snow chuckle nasally, “Okay.”

“We should head back to the table before Emma comes barging in here thinking we’ve killed each other.” Regina smiled widely as Snow pulled back from their embrace to wipe at her eyes and sniffle.

“Yes, of course,” Snow stood and smoothed her entire outfit, fixing a few rogue hairs in the process, “Plus, I’m starving.”

“As am I. Camping food isn’t exactly nourishing for the body.” Regina chuckle softly as Snow gestured towards the restroom. The younger woman entered the women’s bathroom as Regina conjured a mirror and made sure she looked presentable. Once satisfied, she sent away the mirror and strolled back to the table confidently. Emma looked up as she chewed on a mouthful of grilled cheese and flashed a questioning look at her. Regina just nodded and smiled lightly before noticing a burger with fries next to Emma.

“Is this mine?” The brunette asked excitedly. Henry nodded but quickly swiped the plate and dragged it to the space in front of the spot next to him.

“Sit with me, mom.” He pleaded, pouting unfairly as he knew Regina couldn’t resist. She smiled and gazed at the blonde, laughing when she saw an identical pout on the woman’s lips.

“Like mother, like son,” Regina smirked before taking the spot next to Henry, “Sorry, sweetheart, I’m going with our son.”

Regina chuckled when she saw Henry smirk and Emma look at her like a deer in headlights. The blonde chuckled uncomfortably, “Yeah, kid, we’re friends now. Friends give each other pet names like that.”

“Emma,” Henry giggled, “You guys are so much more than friends. You’re girlfriends, the kind that kiss and hold hands, not the one’s that talk about guys together.”

“Henry, where’d you hear these things?” Regina questioned, her eyes twinkling. Emma just looked shell-shocked.

“TV.” He stated factually, shrugging his shoulders carelessly.

“Mhmm, of course.” Regina shrugged as well but her smile and tone held absolute amusement. Emma suddenly burst out laughing, catching the attention of the patrons and her mother, who was walking towards the booth. Regina joined in, not caring about the stares they were getting. Henry just giggled as he shoved a fry into his mouth. 

“I think we need to start putting parental controls on our TV’s,” Emma let out one last bark of laughter before she swiped a fry through the pile of ketchup on her plate. Snow plopped down next to her daughter, managing to steal a seasoned fry from her plate, “Hey! You wait for your food. It’s not our fault you ordered a steak.”

Snow just rolled her eyes, “So why do you need to control Henry’s TV programming?”

“He’s learning stuff from it. Right now, it’s harmless but those teenage years can be pesky.” The blonde’s eyes darted between Regina, who was taking a generous bite from her burger, and Snow, who was smiling at her, as Henry proclaimed, girlfriend lovingly. Well, what a talk they must’ve had. 

“So, how was camping?” Snow asked as Ruby placed her plate in front of her. 

“So many mosquitos!” Henry exclaimed, his eyes rolling. Regina ran her fingers through his hair lovingly before returning to her meal.

“I enjoyed it, reminded me a bit of home.” The older brunette offered and Snow clapped excitedly.

“Oh, I’m so glad!” She exclaimed. Okay, that talk had to be otherworldly, Emma mused happily. Former enemies were chatting merrily over lunch. Damn.

“Uh, listen, now that I have you both here, I have something to ask.” Emma turned a bit, facing both Snow and Regina. The two brunettes looked at her expectantly. 

“What is it, Emma?” Regina asked, causing Snow to look between them curiously. Regina usually called Emma by her surname so this was a noteworthy change. She shook it off quickly. Friends called each other by their first names. Snow dismissed her unwarranted thoughts. 

“So, I want Henry to stay at the mansion for a while so that Regina and him could get reacquainted and hang out,” Henry and Regina smiled brightly while Snow furrowed her brows, “And I was thinking that maybe I could go with him? Take a small suitcase, pack my stuff, and just be with you guys for a while. You know, so we can establish a united front.”

“So cool! Mom, please!” Henry turned to Regina, who was smiling widely at both her son and future lover.

“I would love that, Emma. Truly, I would.” Emma breathed out in relief, playfully swiping at her forehead causing Henry to laugh and Regina to smirk.

“Wait, wait, wait!” Snow shrieked, “You’re just going to move out?”

“Mom, I love you guys but Regina and I have been building something, a family unit, and we should all be together in one place.” Emma wanted to say that she needed to be with Regina, to care for her during the coming weeks and to help find a way to save her. Also, if it was impossible like Regina said, at least she spent the last few weeks of the brunette’s life caring for and loving her.

“Regina and I?” Snow asked knowingly, her face blank. Emma didn’t know what to say. She wasn’t sure if Regina wanted people to know or if they were going to keep their relationship a secret, just between the three of them. Would the brunette want people to know?

“Yes, Snow, Emma and I are romantically involved.” Well, Regina took that one in stride. Snow pursed her lips in thought.

“Alright, just don’t hurt her.” Snow nodded, her lips tilting upward slightly.

“I’ll try my best.” Regina smiled back before taking a bite of burger. Snow lifted her fork and knife and began cutting her steak.

“Oh, this steak is like butter—“

“Wait! That’s it? No lecture? No disappointing look or World War III?” Emma squeaked, her arms flailing dramatically.

“Emma, I’ll be sad to see you go but, you’re right, this is what’s best for Henry. The same goes for your relationship. You’ve been so happy this morning and you fight for her. She also loves so strongly and I know she’ll do her best to be what you need,” Snow chuckled lightly as she chewed on a piece of savory steak, “Now your father’s a different story. Getting him to understand may feel like pulling teeth.”

“Great.” Emma drawled sarcastically. Regina just laughed under her breath, elbowing Henry playfully.

“And grandma, we’re going to Six Flags!” Henry shrieked excitedly. Snow gasped.

“I’ve always wanted to go there!”

“No!” Emma yelled rapidly, garnering the attention of everyone… again. Regina just snickered as Snow gaped at her daughter, “I mean, this is about Henry and Regina bonding. And the Bug is too small. And, you know, stuff.”

Snow pouted, “Fine but, one day, we’ll all go back. It’ll be like a big family trip!”

Regina smiled sadly, “Yes, hopefully, one day.”

~_~_~

Emma bounded down the mansion stairs and strolled into the study to join Regina, who was pouring some cider into a glass. She quietly walked up behind the brunette and wrapped her arms around her, feeling her jolt with surprise. 

“So, you and my mom?” Emma had been curious since leaving the diner. They had gone to the park and watched Henry play with children his age. Now, finally at home, Emma let her curiosity flourish. She felt the brunette lean into her touch.

“Yes, we had a nice conversation that ended with good results. We left that diner with a better understanding of each other and a lot of forgiveness.” 

“That’s awesome, Gina,” She placed a sweet kiss onto the brunette’s temple, “I hope that the whole moving in here thing wasn’t too forward.”

“No!” Regina turned in her arms, wrapping her arms around Emma’s midsection, “I think it’s a great idea. I would love having you around.”

Emma smiled at the sincerity in the chocolate orbs, “I’ll go to the apartment tomorrow and pack up my stuff.”

Regina nodded as her eyes darted down to Emma’s pink lips. She wanted to kiss the other woman but she was waiting for Emma to make the first move. Regina was losing patience though. Luckily, she didn’t have to wait any longer. 

“You’re so beautiful, Regina.” Emma lifted a hand to cradle Regina’s jaw, moving forward to lean their foreheads against the other woman’s. She closed the space between them and finally sealed their lips together. It was sweet and meaningful and everything they wanted. Emma pulled back and anxiously looked down at Regina’s chest.

The brunette caught on and sighed, “You weren’t the one that broke my heart, Emma. It won’t work.”

Emma scrunched her nose, “So Henry?”

“Yes,” Regina placed a kiss on Emma’s nose, her hand on the blonde’s neck and her thumb stroking Emma’s small ear, “But I’m scared to tell him because he’ll want to help.”

“Of course he will! He loves you!” Emma whispered, shaking her head. The answer, the cure, was right upstairs, sleeping in his Avengers pajamas. 

“I know he cares for me but I’m not sure if he…”

“Loves you enough to cure this?” Emma felt understanding flood her mind and body, her shoulders sagging at the self-loathing in Regina’s eyes. 

“What if he kisses me and it doesn’t work? That would surely kill me.” Regina whispered and Emma dropped her chin.

“It will work, my love. He loves you so much. You can’t let your fear of disappointment stop you from trying because either way, you die and I can’t let that happen,” Emma paused for a moment, her thumb caressing Regina’s cheek, “Besides, he knows something’s up. He asked me at the diner.”

“He did?” The brunette sighed, letting her arms fall back onto Emma’s slim waist.

“Yeah and I think we should tell him. He’s really worried.” 

“But Six Flags—“

“Screw Six Flags! We want you to be healthy.” Regina let her head fall onto Emma’s shoulder.

“Tomorrow, after you’re settled in, we’ll tell him.” Regina whispered and Emma nodded, relief and a small amount of anxiety flooding her system, a dichotomy. She was sure that his kiss would work but what if it didn’t? Then there would be no hope and the true sadness would settle over the family. 

“It’s going to work.” Emma was trying to convince not only Regina, but herself as well. 

It needed to work. It had to.


	8. Change

Emma stuffed her shirts into a large box, not bothering to fold anything. Snow was sitting on the edge of her bed, watching the blonde amusedly, and Charming was leaning against the wall by the stairs, picking at his callouses. 

“I don’t understand why you have to move over there.” Charming grumbled, secretly removing items from the boxes when Emma’s back was turned. Snow would throw him disapproving glances, especially when their daughter would seem perturbed by the moved objects. 

“Dad, I told you why already, about a hundred times actually.” Emma stated offhandedly as she pulled her bras and panties from a drawer. Charming looked to the ceiling, not wanting to see his daughter’s underwear. 

“You can show a united front without living there.” He replied, his tone a bit frustrated and confused. Emma rolled her eyes when her back was turned and Snow shifted uncomfortably. She never lied to her husband and would never. Her daughter peered at her and the pixie-haired woman looked away guiltily. 

Emma sighed before turning towards her father wearily, “There’s more to this.”

Charming eye’s darted between his wife and a nervous Emma, “Okay, what’s going on here?”

“I-I—uh, would miss Henry!” Emma sputtered, her eyes wide at the fact that the deceit had automatically come flying out. She wasn’t embarrassed of her relationship and she didn’t want it to be a secret. She was just afraid of losing her father. Charming had always been more like her and she couldn’t lose him. It also didn’t help that in the past, any mistake was a reason to be sent back to Social Services. She knew deep down that Snow and Charming wouldn’t leave her now but the past was niggling in her mind. They had abandoned her as a baby. Of course, that had been more about self-preservation but it stuck with the blonde. In her foster homes, as most of the parents were ignorant or extremely religious, being bisexual was frowned upon and would surely get you sent back. It was something deeply ingrained in Emma and she couldn’t help but lie because that was her own self-preservation. 

“Oh, of course, makes sense.” Emma could tell he was disappointed with her answer and flinched. Did he know already? The blonde peered at Snow suspiciously and her mother grimaced without meeting her eyes.

“She told you, didn’t she?” Emma sighed, throwing Snow once last glare before turning to her father. He pursed his lips and nodded.

“Yeah, she’s really bad at keeping a secret. Just ask your girlfriend.” He teased, a small smile gracing his features. Emma felt a bit of weight lift off her shoulders. He wasn’t reacting negatively. Snow gasped and threw a balled sock at her husband, who allowed the garment to land squarely on his chest before falling to the floor.

“Are you guys really okay with this? Because a few days ago, you were all over me about just hanging out with her.” Charming and Snow looked at one another meaningfully, the brunette hopping out of bed to curl into her husbands side.

“Emma, your mother told me about her conversation with Regina at the diner and we started realizing that we can never give up on the people who matter most. Whether I understand it or not, Regina was critical in Snow’s life and your mother loves her. We can’t give up on the people we love and we won’t give up on her. And maybe this is our chance to make things right, to allow you and her to be happy. Plus, it would be extremely hypocritical for us to talk about love the way we do and then try to deny our daughter a chance at it.” Charming explained and Emma felt her heart soar as she watched her parents smile at her. 

“Thank you,” She whispered, her voice cracking as emotion crawled up from her gut. She let out a breath of relief as she bent down to pick up the balled up sock projectile, “You know, she’s actually really fucking great when you get to know her, get past her walls.”

“Believe me, I know.” Snow smiled widely, her eyes brightening as she seemingly recalled the past. 

~_~_~

“Hey! That’s cheating!” Henry squealed as he continued pressing buttons on the controller frantically. His brunette mother just chuckled evilly as her character raced past his on the screen, managing to throw a banana peel in from of his racecar before speeding away.

“Come on, Henry, this is an embarrassment to the family!” Regina shoved him playfully, causing his controller to slip. Henry tried to glare but his smile was betraying him. 

“You’re such a cheater!” He laughed as he grabbed his controller quickly and returned to the game, managing to make up some distance as Bowser, Regina’s character of course, crashed into a wall zealously. 

“Damn it Bowser! Get your head in the game!” Regina shouted causing Henry to giggle as his character, Mario, which Regina had taunted his for by saying it was too unoriginal, raced closer and closer. Emma appeared in the doorway of the living room quietly, content to hide in the shadows and watch the mother and son bond over an Xbox game. She couldn’t contain her bright smile as Henry lost to his mother and Regina jumped off the couch, lifting her arms into the air victoriously. Emma looked back to see Snow and Charming stifling a laugh before turning back to the loves of her life. 

“Let’s see how you sleep tonight, knowing that you needed to play dirty in order to beat me at a video game.” Henry launched himself at Regina, knocking her onto the couch before burrowing into her side. The two laughed breathlessly.

“I’ll sleep like a baby!” Regina shouted, “I am once again victorious!”

Emma moved forward into the room in order to hear their voices better. She heard giggles from her son and joyful chuckles from Regina, causing her own smile to widen. In the back, Snow and Charming felt guilt fill their hearts. They encouraged Emma to take Henry away from the older brunette. Snow enabled Henry’s deluded hatred with a book that told half-truths and never showed the villains side. 

“Come on, children, play nice.” Emma made her presence known loudly, causing Henry and Regina to jump and shriek slightly, though the brunette woman would deny it until she was blue in the face.

“Emma, you’re early.” Regina smiled as she kneeled on the couch, leaning her front on the couch’s back, placing a sweet peck on the blonde’s lips. Emma reached up to cradle her cheek, leaning in for another kiss but paused when they heard Henry groaned.

“Gross!” The boy popped up and imitated his mother’s position. Regina let out a bark of laughter as Emma gaped at the boy.

“Well, excuse us kid, we missed each other.” The blonde grumbled, poking his shoulder.

“It’s only been six hours.” Snow added humorously and Henry nodded, wrapping his small arm around Regina before borrowing his face into her neck. Emma ruffled his hair and kissed her girlfriend’s nose before turning to her parents, ushering them up the stairs and to the guest room that would be hers. Regina and Emma had decided that because their relationship was so new, the blonde would move into the guest room until later on, if there was a chance for a later on. They did agree that the blonde could sleep in Regina’s bed so that she could care for the brunette during her fatigues. That was just an excuse though, as the two women felt the need to be close to one another after declaring their love, feeling a strong pull. Emma supposed the whole guest room thing was society’s effect on their behavior. Rules told them that you didn’t move into a woman’s room after dating for a day. 

“In here.” Emma strolled into the bland but large room and gestured at the floor, wanting her parents to put her boxes down. Snow took a cursory glance around.

“Wow, Emma, it’s so you.” Snow stated sarcastically and Emma couldn’t help but laugh.

“Regina said I have free reign to paint or redecorate. I’m going to take her up on it. After you guys leave, I’m going to drag them to the stores. I’m Emma-fying this room and Regina’s going to regret giving me permission.” She heard Charming snort as she began unpacking her clothes, separating pants, shirts, and under garments. 

“What color are you thinking?” Snow asked excitedly, already imagining the room in a pastel color. 

“I don’t know, maybe red.” Emma smiled as she stuffed her jeans into a drawer. 

“Oh, dear, you’re going to paint my room the same color as that dreaded leather jacket, aren’t you?” Regina drawled with a smirk as she strolled into the guest room. Charming chuckled as Snow smiled affectionately at the older brunette.

“You love that jacket.” Emma pouted. Regina carefully opened the box labeled ‘shirts’ and began helping the blonde unpack. Snow and Charming claimed to be supervising. Henry arrived a while later and jumped onto the bed next to his grandparents, joining in on the ‘supervision’. After about thirty minutes of continuous work, the two women managed to finish unpacking everything, which wasn’t much considering Emma’s tendency to not keep souvenirs from her travels. 

The Charming’s took their leave, wanting to give the Swan-Mills family a bit of alone time. Regina escaped to the kitchen to prepare lunch while Emma challenged Henry to Mario Karts. The brunette decided on homemade grilled cheese and fries with ketchup. She also decided to make a sauce made of mayo and ketchup that she saw high school students create during lunch. She plated everything and placed it on the dining room table before calling out to Emma and Henry. 

“Nice! Thanks.” The blonde nudged her son.

“Thank you mom!” Henry immediately bit into his sandwich, and wiggled in his seat. The family began chowing down, with Emma moaning and Regina eating daintily. 

“So, after this, I was thinking we could go buy the supplies needed for the demo.” Emma joked before shoving a ketchup-coated fry into her mouth. 

“Sounds good.” Regina replied quickly. She was excited to change up the house a bit. During her the first few days of this affliction, she noticed that her home was bland and not homey. She didn’t tell Henry or Emma but she planned to redecorate the entire house before they went to Six Flags. She wanted the mansion to be their home when she was gone and it needed to be lively, just like the people that would live in it. 

~_~_~

“Can we paint all the rooms?” Henry exclaimed, holding several strips of color choices in his hands. Emma shook her head but paused when she saw Regina nod.

“I actually want to change the house up, maybe paint some of the rooms together and put up some pictures. I was actually thinking of painting my room a light blue. It’s my favorite color.” Regina directed the last statement at Emma, who smiled widely, as she plucked a strip that held different shades of blue from the wall. She loved Regina but that mansion was so cold. Seeing her make active change was truly causing Emma’s heart to flutter excitedly. 

“I think redecorating is an amazing idea, babe.” Regina quirked a brow at the pet name but didn’t comment. 

“Yeah! This is going to be so much fun!” Henry bounded towards the far end of the wall and began perusing through the multitude of choices, with differing shades and brightness piquing his interest. Emma pressed her front against the brunette’s back as she wrapped her arms around her.

“So what’s the reasoning behind this, hm?” Regina twisted her neck to glance at her love.

“A few days ago, when I was extremely upset about my… issue,” Regina whispered so Henry wouldn’t hear, “I began analyzing my life and choices and I saw how uninviting my house was. It saddened me to think that such an imaginative boy lived in such a sterile house. I even wondered if it contributed to his hatred towards me. The more I thought about it, the more I hated my own mansion. I just want it to represent the good, the happiness and fun, not the negative aspects of my personality. I look around that place and I see my bad side. I want to change that, especially for you two. When I’m gone, I want you to remember us laughing and joking as we painted and moved furniture. I want a home, not just a house.” Emma nuzzled her face into the brunette’s neck and tightened her hold.

“Then I can’t wait to get started.” Emma whispered, watching their son excitedly pluck colors from the wall. 

“Henry, let me see that purple one from Behr,” The boy ran over and Regina took the offending strip before Henry ran back to the humongous selection, “I like this lavender for my study. It’s very calming.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty but it doesn’t match the furniture.” Emma lifted a hand to move the brunette’s hair to one side.

“I’m going to donate my furniture to the local homeless shelter and buy new things, better things.” Regina stated, her fingers absentmindedly rubbing on the lavender paint strip.

“Maybe some to the shelter and some to the orphanage?” Emma questioned and Regina nodded fervently.   
“Of course,” Regina sighed, “This is the first time I’ve ever felt so excited to tear apart the familiar and start anew. Even the curse scared me beyond belief but this, this is exhilarating.” 

“I’m excited too. I get to see you in overall’s.” Emma chuckled, her breath tickling the brunette’s neck.

“Excuse me? I will not wear—“

“You want to get your Donna Karan covered in Behr Ultra Premium?” Regina groaned.

~_~_~

Emma had to laugh. She had to because there was her family, all of them, and some friends in overalls standing in the former Evil Queen’s foyer with paintbrushes and ladders, smiling like they just won a war. And then there was Regina, also in overalls, mumbling grumpily about dwarfs and Snow White and banes of her existence. 

“Come on Regina! We just want to help!” Ruby shouted from the back with cutoff overalls that showed off her long legs. 

“Yeah, sister! Snow said you’ve changed and you need help painting. Plus, we’re bored.” Grumpy bellowed from behind Charming. The other six dwarfs nodded enthusiastically. 

“I’m just here to supervise.” Granny grumbled from next to Ruby, who had bedazzled her grandmother’s overalls. Snow pointed at the old woman and nodded in agreement. She wasn’t into all of that manual labor.

“I’ve been told I’m a very good artist,” Belle stated joyfully but turned to Ruby to mumble, “And I need to get out of that pawn shop for at least a day. It’s so stuffy.”

Archie stood on his tiptoes to peer at Regina from behind Granny, “I hear painting can be very relaxing for the psyche.” 

Emma leaned into Regina and pouted, “Come on, Gina. Look at them. They just want to help.”

Regina rolled her eyes, “Fine! The furniture is already gone and the floors are covered. I’m going to use magic to protect the ceilings, doorframes, and floors. Each room has the cans with the color assigned to it. Let’s go, no dillydallying.”

The group scattered, the dwarfs running up the stairs along with Snow and Charming while Archie, Granny, Ruby, and Belle strolled to the study. Regina twirled, looking for their son, “Where’s Henry?”

“He’s out back with Pongo.” Archie answered while adjusting his overalls. Regina sighed with relief, having felt her heart seize when she couldn’t spot their son.

“Hey, relax,” Emma whispered, kissing Regina’s cheek, “Me and the gang are going to paint. You go and create collages and put them in frames. It’ll be therapeutic.”

“Alright,” Emma turned to leave but the brunette grabbed her forearm and dragged her into the kitchen. Regina looked around before whispering, “Has Henry brought up the subject again?”

Emma scratched her scalp, “No, he hasn’t but—“

“I don’t think we should tell him unless her asks again.” The older woman whispered hurriedly, leaning her back onto the fridge, “It’s just why bother him, right?”

“Regina, he’s going to find out and he hates being lied to or being kept out of the loop. We should just come clean,” Emma sighed, “I know it’ll be hard and he’s going to be devastated but he’s our only chance here.”

Regina blew out a breath, “Okay, we’ll tell him tomorrow.”

“Babe, you said that two days ago,” Emma replied quietly, reaching forward to interlace their fingers, “Tonight, at my parent’s place, we’ll tell him, and maybe my parents.”

“Your parents? No, Emma. They’ll become insufferable with their pity and wallowing.” Regina scrunched up her face adorably and Emma couldn’t contain her smile.

“We’ll see. Right now, go through pictures and calm down. Relax.” Emma kissed Regina soundly, mewling in the process. She smiled against Regina’s lips.

“Alright.” Emma nodded, placing a peck on the brunette’s nose. Regina stilled seemed unsettled so the blonde pulled her love into an embrace.

“When I turned twenty one, I drove my Bug from some small town to Orlando. I snuck into Epcot and feasted on the food of the world. I met a woman there that was just like me, down on her luck. She told me that I had to accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope. Right now, with this broken heart business, I’m so disappointed with Fate, with myself, and even with Henry, but I will never lose hope that you will live. Live until we’re both old farts in a nursing home, playing dominos and using the bathroom every five minutes.”

“That sounds nice.” Regina joked with watery eyes. Emma smiled.

“Yeah, and you best believe we’ll get there, babe.”


	9. Crash

Regina was seated on the plastic covered loveseat, listening to all of the commotion in the Charming Apartment. Emma and Charming were arguing over some sport that the brunette had no interest in hearing about, Snow was singing obnoxiously while cooking some mediocre meal, and Henry was right next to her, playing his DS. 

She realized that this was her penance. After years of misdeeds and evils, she was being punished for her crimes. The sentence? Spending the night in Snow White and Prince Charming’s apartment while the paint at her house dried. Honestly, Regina mused, she would rather go back to Mifflin, watch paint literally dry, and take the chance of losing brain cells from the fumes. Not that it mattered; she would kick the bucket in a few weeks anyway. 

“Did you hear that Ruby and Granny walked into the diner’s kitchen today and found brand spanking new appliances and a bunch of upgrades?” Snow shrieked as she stirred something on the stovetop. 

Regina cleared her throat, “Yes, I did it.”

Everyone snapped his or her eyes towards the stoic brunette but Emma spoke up, “Really?”

“Yes. I wanted to do something nice for them, make up for some of my transgressions,” She shifted uncomfortably as she felt the air thin. Snow looked oddly suspicious so the older woman added, “I’m trying to do—to be—better and that includes trying to apologize for my mistakes. I thought I would start with you, Snow, then I moved on to Ruby and Granny as I thought they would be more receptive to me.”

“Wait, so, they knew you’re the one that did it?” Charming piped up from behind his cocoa-filled mug. Really, drinking hot chocolate before a savory dinner? How uncivilized. 

“I appeared after they celebrated the changes to their kitchen and explained everything and apologized for the past.” Henry smiled up at his brunette mother proudly, giving her arm a supportive squeeze, and Regina returned the gesture wholeheartedly. When the sorceress shyly peered at the others in the room, she noticed that Charming, the oaf, was smiling goofily, Emma seemed downtrodden, and Snow still seemed suspicious. Of what? Regina had an idea. After all, she couldn’t expect them to accept her with open arms, especially considering her former conniving ways. They didn’t know what was going on. They didn’t know that she didn’t have enough time, enough life, left to be vicious. She wasn’t looking to spend her last few weeks trying to destroy these people for good. No, she just wanted to be happy in her body, with herself. 

She wondered if telling them would help or hinder. Obviously, there would be pity and sadness, but she could always run to the loft and only descend when it was time to go. Then again, Snow was a persistent woman. She’d probably hop into the bed with her and cling to her like a koala. She dismissed the train of thought. She needed to survive dinner before she could make plans for that night’s discussion.

“Have you made amends with anyone else?” Snow asked, her voice tight with caution, as she added an inordinate amount of salt into her simmering sauce. 

“Well, I’ve made peace with you, Emma, Henry, Charming, Ruby and Granny, and tomorrow I plan to talk to Jefferson. He and I were once friends and I do feel terrible about his daughter.” Regina felt so tired, her voice slightly muffled by her heavy jaw. She felt a rush of panic flood her veins as she looked over at the clock and saw that it was only six o’clock. She gritted her teeth as her insufferable former foe rabbled on and on.

“… And I think it’s great! But I suppose I’m just confused by your timing. This was all so sudden, you know?” 

Henry was giving her a quizzical look and… he couldn’t find out this way! He couldn’t see her deteriorate like Emma had. She cleared her throat as she felt it constrict.

“I need to use the restroom.” She muttered, managing to lift her body and stand confidently before taking a few uneven steps.

“Regina?” She heard Emma question nervously and Charming’s hand came into view, as if trying to hold her steady but he was too afraid to actually touch her. She tried to open her mouth but it wouldn’t work, her jaw too heavy. This couldn’t be happening! There was a pattern! 

“Gina? Babe, are you okay?” She felt Emma’s pale hand on her shoulder and Regina felt her breath accelerate, her fear become overwhelming. Henry couldn’t see her like this. So, she took a few strong steps forward, throwing a small smile towards the Charming’s. 

“I’m… fine.” She sputtered, her feet dragging forward. Emma’s eyes were glistening and the brunette felt angry with herself. She was too weak to fix this, to fight it. She had always been such a fool. Emma’s hope speech was being drowned out by her dark thoughts and she tried to think positively but it felt like a battle she couldn’t win. Magic may have saved her from Leopold and Cora but it definitely couldn’t save her from herself. 

“It’s not twelve! Why is this happening?” Emma whispered shakily and Snow scrunched her brows as she rushed forward to grab onto Regina but her efforts were useless as the older woman crashed to the floor, her eyes wide open but her face scrunched with pain. 

“Regina!” Charming, Snow, and Emma all bellowed at the exact same moment while Henry’s terrified screams would forever be ingrained in her mind, playing on repeat over and over. He shouldn’t witness this. She begged Emma with her chocolate orbs to take their son away from there but the blonde was too worried about her, too caught up in confusion. It was like Emma couldn’t hear the boy. Unfortunately, that was all Regina could hear. 

“Mom!” He yelled. God, his voice sounded so strange when filled with utter panic, “Mom!”

She heard Emma scold him and tell him to give them some space before turning to her parent, “We’ll explain later! Just let me take her upstairs!”

“Explain?” Snow shrieked, her voice shaky and deep with emotion, “What’s going on?”

“I said later!” Emma sounded frantic and she just wanted to reach up and scratch her scalp, just how the blonde liked it. She wanted to whisper comforts in her ear while rubbing soothing circles on her back. But she couldn’t. She was paralyzed, confused, and angry. She had six more hours with her family. She wanted to taste that salty sauce and scold Snow for not learning how to season. She wanted to cheat at video games with her son and gloat when she won unfairly. She wanted to glare at Charming and make him squirm. She wanted to kiss Emma adoringly as she playfully swatted at her backside. 

As Emma lifted her body, carrying her like a bride, which made her realize how much she wanted to marry this woman some day, she cried. Her eyes leaking uncontrollably as a fierce pain traveled from her chest to her toes and back. It was insufferable. But it couldn’t be. She had a few more weeks! She could practically hear Rumple in her ear telling that magic in Storybrooke was unpredictable. 

They finally arrived at the top of the stairs and Emma raced to the bed, gently lowering her with a grunt. If she could, she would’ve joked that she wasn’t that heavy but she figured that Emma wasn’t in the mood for jests. Her head lolled to the side and she saw Snow standing there anxiously, looking devastated. The younger brunette just stared at her, hiccupping and crying. 

“Regina?” Snow whispered and Emma snapped her eyes up, ready to yell, when she felt Regina’s fingers spell the word ‘no’ on her arm. The blonde leaned into her love’s body, her eyes wide and watery. Snow sniffled, “Is she okay?”

Regina’s fingers lazily spelled out ‘tell them’ and Emma’s eyes slammed shut. Suddenly, the blonde the fingers move again, spelling ‘don’t tell Henry about TLK’. Emma scoffed emotionally, her incredulity marring her beautiful face.

“This isn’t supposed to happen like this,” The savior whispered harshly, “We were supposed to talk to him together and tell him the truth, the whole truth. He was supposed to kiss you and make you healthy again and we were supposed to be a family and grow old together. You can’t expect me to give up and not tell him simply because you’re too stubborn to see how much that kid loves you.”

“Emma?” She heard Charming speak softly but Emma shook her head.

“Guess what, Gina, this isn’t just about you anymore. I love you,” Emma’s voice broke as a sob surfaced, “Henry loves you and, fuck, I’m not listening to you right now.”

Regina groaned, the pain intensifying even further. The blonde turned to her parents, pointing towards the stairs, “Get Henry and come up with him.”

Regina felt her eyes close, unable to stop it. She felt anxiety build the longer she couldn’t see her surroundings. Her fear of darkness began when she was just a little girl. She was caught playing with a woman that mucked out the stalls and her mother told her that the peasants were for work, not friendship. Regina, being a naïve little girl that had yet to learn true discrimination of the class system, tried to fight her mother on it by saying that people were people and everyone deserved respect. Cora did not take that well, locking her in the dark closet and using her magic to render her helpless, just like she was now. The only thing keeping her from panicking was the constant warmth from her love’s hand. 

She needed to know if it was the end so she could say, or technically spell, her goodbyes so she moved her fingers once again, spelling ‘Rumple’. 

Of course, Emma understood what she wanted as she shouted, “Rumplestiltskin!”

Regina waited, fearing that the man never truly cared for her, that she had always only been a pawn in his grand scheme. She never thought she would’ve been happier to hear, “Yes, dearie?”

“Please, Mr. Gold, help me understand what’s happening! She had more time!” Emma cried and Regina heard a gasp that sounded like it came from The Dark One. 

“Magic is so unpredictable here,” Rumple whispered, his tone defeated. If Regina could, she would question his sudden care for her but she didn’t have time to give him grief so she squeezed Emma’s arm and spelled ‘I want to tell him something’. 

And again, the blonde understood and waved the man over. He hobbled until he reached the bed, where he lowered himself gently, not wanting to jostle the brunette. Emma lifted Regina’s hand and placed it on his arm, “She wants to tell you something.”

Regina vaguely heard Henry crying and Snow frantically moving about, probably up the stairs, but she blocked out the commotion. She needed to know what was happening, even if deep down she knew. But she spelled out ‘am I dying right now?’ and waited as she heard Rumple sigh.

“I don’t think so, your majesty,” He spoke softly, in a way Regina had never heard before. She wondered if he ever loved her, if he ever thought twice about manipulating her the way he did, “I believe this is the starting block. You most likely have a few days left and, from what I’ve read, it is extremely debilitating and unpleasant.”

Regina felt tears prickle her eyes and she allowed her hand to fall away from his arm, only to have Emma immediately snatch it from mid air and press it to her ample chest. The brunette could feel Emma’s heart beating wildly, and with good reason. She just heard Rumple, the authority on magic, say that the timeline had shifted, that Regina was on death’s door. The blonde couldn’t stop the flow of tears as she turned aggressively and roared, “What’s taking so long?”

“Mom?” He sounded so unlike himself, so unsure. Henry was many things, strong, clever, mature, but not hesitant. He never wavered on his beliefs and he never questioned what he knew to be fact. Obviously, looking at his mother, he knew Regina was deathly sick and yet, it seemed like he was begging for this situation to be a nightmare that he could rouse from. She just wished she could talk to him.

“Come here, Henry.” Emma stated, patting the spot where Rumple had been. Had he left without her noticing? Most likely. Rumplestiltskin never stayed to watch the turmoil. 

“Emma,” He ran forward and grabbed Regina’s hand with such strength that the brunette would’ve jumped if she could, “What’s going on?”

“Kid, remember at the diner when you asked what’s wrong?” Pause, “Well, there is, something is really wrong. Your mom has a magical illness called a broken heart and she’s… she’s not doing so hot.”

“A broken heart?” Oh, his voice was full of dread and Regina could only imagine the thoughts running rampant, guilty and angry thoughts. The boy was already blaming himself and he didn’t know what the affliction really was yet, though the boy was clever and could garner a good guess from the name.

“Yeah, your mom got so depressed that her magic went nuts and it caused this to happen. We thought she’d have a few weeks but Mr. Gold said that magic is unpredictable and he’s right. Henry, there’s something else I need to tell you—“

Regina snapped her hand over Emma’s forearm but she continued, “Your mom’s heart broke because of our rejection of her when Snow and I came back. The only way to fix this is—“

Regina clenched her fingers, digging her nails in Emma’s forearm but the blonde didn’t even flinch, “True Love’s Kiss and it can only be done by the person that broke her heart.”

The room went silent and Regina unclenched her fingers before Henry whispered, “Me?”

“Yeah, kid, we think so.” More silence. Regina felt her body tense as the room’s air thinned. 

Suddenly, Regina felt the bed rock slightly and breath caress her forehead before she heard her son’s sweet proclamation, “I love you mom, now more than ever.”

Then she felt his lips gently pressing against her forehead.


	10. True Love

When Emma was nine, she was put in a group home in New York where she met a fifteen-year-old girl named Jade. She was dark-skinned with curly black hair and absolutely beautiful features. She loved playing sports and watching TV, a tomboy through and through. Usually that didn’t matter but, in the foster system, being anything but what your gender told you to be was taboo and would likely get you nowhere. Emma liked to think that her flannel and jeans was the reason no one adopted her, not her devil may care attitude or rebellious personality. 

Anyway, one day Jade was hysterical, running around talking about visitors that would surely adopt her because she was going to wear a pink frilly dress that she would’ve teased other girl’s for wearing and a pair of Mary Jane’s. Emma didn’t understand her and would just roll her eyes. Jade was one of those girls that you wanted everything to go right for them because she was so sweet, didn’t have a mean bone in her body. But Emma knew that changing her appearance and tomboyish ways wouldn’t help, as she would grow crazy of being someone she wasn’t. She did admit that the idea was rooted in a good place.

If you wanted to be adopted, you couldn’t be a girl that liked to play rough and watch sports or a boy that liked theater and dance. No, you had to be what society told you to be. If you were a girl, you played with dolls and never spoke your mind. If you were a boy, you roughhoused and knew all of the baseballs stats of that year. That’s what those couples that adopted wanted: perfection. 

So, Jade got all dressed up, straightened her beautiful hair in order to make it more, as she said, ‘Caucasian looking’, and brushed her teeth several times. She talked using proper language, removing slang, and with an effortless speech pattern. The visitors were a straight, white couple from Texas, who carried a bible everywhere and could recite any passage at any time. Jade worked so hard to be proper, to be what they wanted, but the couple had their sights set on Abigail, a short, white girl with a cross on her necklace. They immediately took Abby home and Jade was inconsolable, disappoint so deep that it cut her down to a stub. Emma watched Jade deteriorate and she was watching her son fall victim too. 

Emma rubbed her face, not wanting to watch as her son sobbed to the point of dehydration. Snow was trying to comfort him but Emma knew Henry and he was past the point of reason. He felt like he failed his mother. The kiss hadn’t worked.

“I love my mom! It should’ve worked!” He screamed over and over while Snow repeated her consoling words. 

“I know, sweet boy, I know.” His sobs were so loud it made everyone flinch every time he sucked in a shaky breath. Emma had tried talking to him but he was angry with her, said it was her fault because she had kept the secret and that she should’ve known better. And he was right. Emma should’ve pushed Regina harder, pushed her to come clean. The blonde knew it wouldn’t have mattered though, as his kiss wouldn’t have worked before, just like it hadn’t that day. She passed a shell shocked Charming on the way up the stairs to check on a comatose Regina. The woman had fainted after Henry’s kiss didn’t ease the pain or discomfort, tears rolling down her face with disappointment. It seemed it was recurring theme in the apartment. Emma stopped at the top step, checked on the brunette, and sat gingerly on the stair. Henry’s cries gained volume and Emma couldn’t imagine how painful it was to sob with such ferocity. 

“I love my mom!” 

“We know, sweet heart.” 

Emma wrapped her arms around her knees and tucked her face into the space between her legs and her torso. She wanted to cry and scream but for some reason, she couldn’t. She felt numb. Regina had just gotten her life back; finally loose of the reins Cora, Leopold, and Rumple had been tugging on her with. She was happy, making amends and plans. It wasn’t fair. She was too hyped on adrenaline and shock to cry, even if it was all she wanted to do. But no, she had to stay strong for their son. 

“She can’t die! I just got her back!”

“I know, Henry. It’ll be okay.”

But would it? No, not for a long, long time. If they lost Regina, things would go downhill and fast. Emma was inexperienced at motherhood and she hadn’t dealt with a cold, let alone a loss this extreme. And Emma felt a depression plunging on her. She finally found a love that was true and deep. How was she supposed to move forward without Regina? They were a unit, a united front. 

“I want my mom!” 

Snow stayed silent this time, apparently out of things to say, and Emma was grateful. She didn’t want her mothers false hope and lies. Because things weren’t going to be okay and Emma wasn’t sure about Henry’s love. It was easy to be sure when disaster hadn’t occurred. Now, hope had flown out the window and landed in a gutter to wither away.

“My, my, dearie,” Emma lifted her head slowly as she heard Rumple’s heeled shoe walk near her, “It didn’t work.”

She scoffed, “How could you tell? Was it the sobbing kid or Regina laying comatose in that bed?”

She heard Rumple sigh, “What have you tried so far?”

Henry cried out and Emma cringed, “Henry’s kiss didn’t work and… my kiss didn’t work.”  
Rumple tapped his cane against the floorboards, “Were these kisses simultaneous?”

“What?” Emma felt a thrill of hope crawl up her spine. 

“I suppose,” Rumple drawled, “that you both had a hand in breaking her heart. If that were true, you both would have to give her true love’s kiss simultaneously. I’ve never seen or read of such a case but, with magic, anything is possible.” 

“Are you pulling my chain, Gold?” Emma rose from the step to full height slowly in an attempt to intimidate but the man just smiled.

“My dear, what would my motive be here? I’m a monster, a beast, but I don’t enjoy seeing children this way.”

Emma hurriedly called for Henry, “Get up here!”

The boy continued crying, ignoring her completely, but Emma called for him again, “Kid, we have a chance to save her! Mr. Gold thinks we might have to kiss her at the same time because we both had a hand in it.”

Henry snapped his body towards her, his face pink and his eyes bloodshot, “What?”

“Get your ass up here, kid! We might be able to save her!” The boy ran up the stairs like a bullet, crashing past Emma and landing on the right edge of the bed where Regina was resting, her skin sickly pale and her hair sticking to her face because of perspiration. Emma took Regina’s left side before she peered at her son, who was already staring at her, before nodding. 

“Simultaneous, dearies.” Rumple repeated as Snow and Charming watched from a far, their expressions grim. But Emma and Henry’s eye turned to the brunette as they moved forward at the same time and pressed their lips against Regina’s forehead. After a few second, a flash of blinding light shimmered from Regina’s chest and burst outward, sending everyone flying. Regina sat up with a shuddering gasp as she felt her heart mending and pulsing with joy. Emma and Henry sat up cautiously, their concern’s laying with the brunette they loved. Snow and Charming rose from the corner of the room and walked forward slowly. Rumple watched from the ground with interest.

“Regina?” Emma whispered, feeling Henry’s hand squeeze hers. The brunette blinked rapidly before letting out a laugh, ”Babe, say something.”

Regina smiled at them, “When are we going to Six Flags?”


End file.
